Anti depressants?

I have been on various different anti-depressants over the last 4/5 years, but was only reffered for an ASD assessment after a year of failed Psychotherapy, leading to my confirmed diagnosis last year in my mid fifties.

Based on the ones I have tried so far, they seem to have little effect on me, other than to sometimes quieten down the negative chatter in my head. I have often joked about wanting to experience the emotional flattening effect so many other people have described, by saying  that I always wanted to be Vulcan, but so far my emotions have always remained at maximum volume. I have discussed this with my Doctor & he says that it might be because my head is wired differently, but it is difficult to tell.

I had been taking 225mg of Venlafaxine for the last eighteen months, but a few weeks ago decided to test if it was doing anything at all, by tapering down the dosage. I went from 225->150->75->37.5 very easily over three weeks & am now trying to stop altogether. Aside from an occasional weird pinging noise in my head, the reduction has made no difference whatsover in my mental state, whilst on the positive side though, it has removed other more embarrassing physical side effects of being on anti-depressants .

I know that I should have done this under supervision from my Doctor, but I'm old enough to make my own mistakes now & can easily increase the dose again if I start to feel worse.

A lot of things about the way my head works seem to be backwards, allegedly I am supposed to find social encounters difficult & prefer my own company, but actually the converse is true. The best way for me to deal with sharp dips in my depression is to be around other people, as both my mood & personality tend to reflect the people I associate with. The reason I felt confident enough to try phasing out my medication entirely is that I recently made some good new friends & their excellent company has helped me far more than any anti-depressants I have ever taken.

I know that if I isolate myself again for too long that the depression will probably return with a vengeance, but I have reached the point now where I feel that it's ridiculous to keep taking medication that has few positive effects & noticeable negative ones.

I attend a variety of depression support groups, where people often discuss the benefits of Mindfulness & Acceptance. Sadly these concepts just seem like psycho-babble to me & my main coping strategies are Distraction & Avoidance. If I can't tame the demons in my head, then the best strategy is just to keep them busy with other things so that they don't bother me.

I mentioned earlier that anti-depressants have little effect on me other than to sometimes quieten down the negative chatter. Spending time with friends seems to shut them down completely though, at least while I am in their company. Potentially then, the solution to my depression is to try to spend as much time with other people as possible without overstaying my welcome.

I also think that my depression is somehow a part of my Autistic Spectrum Traits, just combined with negative events in my childhood. Since I only found out that I was on the Spectrum last year though, I am still trying to work out what that means for me. 

Hope this helps

I have been on various different anti-depressants over the last 4/5 years, but was only reffered for an ASD assessment after a year of failed Psychotherapy, leading to my confirmed diagnosis last year in my mid fifties.

Based on the ones I have tried so far, they seem to have little effect on me, other than to sometimes quieten down the negative chatter in my head. I have often joked about wanting to experience the emotional flattening effect so many other people have described, by saying  that I always wanted to be Vulcan, but so far my emotions have always remained at maximum volume. I have discussed this with my Doctor & he says that it might be because my head is wired differently, but it is difficult to tell.

I had been taking 225mg of Venlafaxine for the last eighteen months, but a few weeks ago decided to test if it was doing anything at all, by tapering down the dosage. I went from 225->150->75->37.5 very easily over three weeks & am now trying to stop altogether. Aside from an occasional weird pinging noise in my head, the reduction has made no difference whatsover in my mental state, whilst on the positive side though, it has removed other more embarrassing physical side effects of being on anti-depressants .

I know that I should have done this under supervision from my Doctor, but I'm old enough to make my own mistakes now & can easily increase the dose again if I start to feel worse.

A lot of things about the way my head works seem to be backwards, allegedly I am supposed to find social encounters difficult & prefer my own company, but actually the converse is true. The best way for me to deal with sharp dips in my depression is to be around other people, as both my mood & personality tend to reflect the people I associate with. The reason I felt confident enough to try phasing out my medication entirely is that I recently made some good new friends & their excellent company has helped me far more than any anti-depressants I have ever taken.

I know that if I isolate myself again for too long that the depression will probably return with a vengeance, but I have reached the point now where I feel that it's ridiculous to keep taking medication that has few positive effects & noticeable negative ones.

I attend a variety of depression support groups, where people often discuss the benefits of Mindfulness & Acceptance. Sadly these concepts just seem like psycho-babble to me & my main coping strategies are Distraction & Avoidance. If I can't tame the demons in my head, then the best strategy is just to keep them busy with other things so that they don't bother me.

I mentioned earlier that anti-depressants have little effect on me other than to sometimes quieten down the negative chatter. Spending time with friends seems to shut them down completely though, at least while I am in their company. Potentially then, the solution to my depression is to try to spend as much time with other people as possible without overstaying my welcome.

I also think that my depression is somehow a part of my Autistic Spectrum Traits, just combined with negative events in my childhood. Since I only found out that I was on the Spectrum last year though, I am still trying to work out what that means for me. 

Hope this helps

Pirate Santa said:

my main coping strategies are Distraction & Avoidance. If I can't tame the demons in my head, then the best strategy is just to keep them busy with other things so that they don't bother me.

Pretty much the same as me.I realised ruminating in order to sort out what was wrong with me was just making the depression worse, so distracted with anything to hand, or tried to go or do something new. It took a few months of regular practice but I felt was most of my biggest recovery from the worst depression. I don't actually find the practice that different from acceptance. It doesn't really matter if you are concentrating on the here and now or some intellectual puzzle, so long as you're not worrying about what people think of you and all that rubbish.

Exercise helps more than antidepressants (which don't help at all), but not as much as actually being with friends.

Pirate Santa said:

failed Psychotherapy

Pirate Santa said:

my depression is somehow a part of my Autistic Spectrum Traits, just combined with negative events in my childhood

Also can relate here.

Pirate Santa said:

an occasional weird pinging noise in my head

ISTR venlafaxine is the drug second-most associated with withdrawal effects, after paroxetine. I imagine by now the web is full of stories of brain zaps, and suggestions of how to come off the last smaller dose.