15 year old at crisis point

Please can I ask for some help please.  My daughter is 15 she has been on the pathway for about 21 months now.  Her mental health has deteriorated massively in the last 12 months.  She currently spends every day in her room, in the dark.  She may sometimes come downstairs for 1 hour between 8-9 however this is becoming less frequent.  She barely sleeps at night but sleeps most of the day and hardly eats.  She talks about wanting to end her life and wishes she would never wake up.she hasn’t been at school since September and does not want to go back.  She’s used to be quite academic and do really well in her subjects now she couldn’t care about anything.  She is verbally and physically abusive to me on a more frequent basis.  Calls to the pathway and explaining all this leads me nowhere and I always feel like I’m getting fobbed off.  

I want my daughter to have her assessment as it could help her identify why she is going through this and it may just be what she needs to start to improve.  However, she Just shuts me down every time I try and have some communication with her about this.  She tells me I don’t understand what it’s like to be her and what she’s going through.  

really don’t  understand this waiting time why she cannot be seen sooner rather than later.  Does she need to try to take her life in order for someone to listen.  I wish I could pay for a private assessment but I just don’t have that sort of money.  I am so extremely worried about her.  She barely moves eats or sees daylight.  I will soon also have to worry about the toll this is taking on her physically as well as mentally.  Anyone out there who has experienced this and understands what this is like and can tell me what can I do to help my daughter.  I love her so much and it’s destroying me that I can’t help her.  Thank you.

Parents
  • It seems to me that depression and anxiety are the most pressing problems at the moment. I would try to resolve these first. Speeding up the wait for an autism assessment could also be possible, through the 'right to Choose' pathway.

    "What is 'Right to Choose'?
    In England, patients have a legal Right to Choose who provides their healthcare, including who carries out an autism assessment. GPs should offer you the option to choose a service to carry out the assessment.

    To be eligible for the 'Right to Choose’, the person should:

    be registered with a GP in England
    must not be a prisoner
    must not be detained under the Mental Health Act
    must not be a serving member of the armed forces
    must not be needing a test urgently or have been admitted to hospital.
    The service you request must be providing NHS services in England.

    GPs should always offer the 'Right to Choose' before they refer to a service. This includes providing information about the services available and helping you decide which service is most suitable. Some people prefer the 'Right to Choose' as they may have to wait a shorter time to be assessed, or the provider's location may be more convenient than other alternatives.

    ‘Right to Choose’ is not available in Wales, Northern Ireland or Scotland."

Reply
  • It seems to me that depression and anxiety are the most pressing problems at the moment. I would try to resolve these first. Speeding up the wait for an autism assessment could also be possible, through the 'right to Choose' pathway.

    "What is 'Right to Choose'?
    In England, patients have a legal Right to Choose who provides their healthcare, including who carries out an autism assessment. GPs should offer you the option to choose a service to carry out the assessment.

    To be eligible for the 'Right to Choose’, the person should:

    be registered with a GP in England
    must not be a prisoner
    must not be detained under the Mental Health Act
    must not be a serving member of the armed forces
    must not be needing a test urgently or have been admitted to hospital.
    The service you request must be providing NHS services in England.

    GPs should always offer the 'Right to Choose' before they refer to a service. This includes providing information about the services available and helping you decide which service is most suitable. Some people prefer the 'Right to Choose' as they may have to wait a shorter time to be assessed, or the provider's location may be more convenient than other alternatives.

    ‘Right to Choose’ is not available in Wales, Northern Ireland or Scotland."

Children
  • Thank you - I’ve only recently learned of this option, I wish I’d know about it earlier.  I will speak with the GP but to be perfectly honest, I feel like I need to focus on my D and not throw any assessments into the mix as she’s already refused some CBT sessions from CAMHS.  I understand now that she is in burnout and through talking to others with Teens in a very similar situation, I need to give her time to recover which could be months even a couple of years.  So grateful for these platforms as they are so useful and reassuring when you feel like there is no hope.