Published on 12, July, 2020
I just can't. I wish she wasn't autistic, she is 9 and was diagnosed a couple of months ago. I read some of the posts on here in tears because all you parents are so wonderful...I must be a terrible mother if I can't love her, but she is no good at being a daughter.
I have 3 other children who are all beautiful and neurotypical and don't cause me any trouble, and I look at them with such pride, yet I can't look at my autistic daughter with pride at all. I try and do my best for her but it wears me down, I spend most of my life in tears over her behaviour and I just don't know what to do. Children are meant to bring you joy and she does not bring me joy.
This is ruining my life, my husband wants me to see a doctor and discuss going onto antidepressants or to seek counselling, but neither of those things can change my daughter.
Please tell me I'm not alone in this feeling.
hope you're ok . you need to be proud of your daughter . autistic people or kids are no different than real children normal children . i don't think antidepressant works for anyone .
Sadly, this post is from 5 years ago... x
Is anyone else as curious as to how this one resolved, as I am?
My relationship with my Dad, if he had been able to accept me for what I am, and recognise the difference between "bad character" and "can't do" could have been a LOT more enjoyable & satisfying for HIM...
No one ever gets beyond the wound of their parents. Sexual, Physical, Psychological - those wounds last forever. It takes years in a therapists office to learn how to navigate it. No one ever 'rises above', they just manage and occasionally slip in to the luxury of forgetting.
A Neurotypical posting this is doing it in the form of a confession. They're looking for excuses and a slap on the wrist. There's a deep cognitive dissonance.