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Quitting extra curricular clubs

Bugs_17

Hi everyone, really new here. 

I was just wondering if anyone had any advice or experience of a pre-teen suddenly wanting to quit all their extra curricular clubs? My son (11) has ASD, loves, trains, fixing things, reading and gaming.

He has recently quit one club due to no longer enjoying it and some bullying which I totally understand. Now he wants to quit Taekwondo, which has been a great confidence booster to him as a result of bullying and he's been doing really well. He doesn't have any firm friends but seems to get on ok and his teacher is excellent and really supportive.

I'm finding it hard to strike a balance of managing his overwhelm, listening to his needs but also trying to make sure he doesn't quit everything at the drop of a hat. He also is resistant to do any exercise so I'm keen for him to keep up with Taekwondo and swimming, his only clubs.

Has anyone else had this balancing act? I've asked him about alternative clubs/exercise but he's not at all interested. 

  • in reply to TheCatWoman

    Thanks  Yeah the thought had crossed my mind too that it might be an age thing rather than an asd associated thing. And that is fine it will just be persuading him to do something else exercise wise! x

  • in reply to Cinnabar_wing

    It really does just help to hear everyone else's experiences! Thank you x

  • Hi, I have an 11yo and an 8 yo. 

    We used to do a lot of clubs and activities, and between them we used to have to take them to things 6 out of 7 days. 

    This school year, it's been different. My son (11), completed swimming in the summer so stopped that, but he's keeping hockey for now (lots of boys do it at his school). He did tennis but it stopped for to a lack of coach.  He has taken up archery, I think this is because it was a new opportunity in the area and more casual.

    As my daughter's (8) been a bit burnt out herself, she's taking a break from swimming (hopefully she'll go back). She did judo but is giving that a break too (I'm hoping she might go back to judo next year or two as it was great for her confidence).  She tried hockey and a nature club but that was too much for her anxiety. Having more time at home is helping her cope better emotionally though.

    They both have kept their music though, so maybe you could see if he wants to try something else? Music is the only thing my daughter has kept this year.

    I was concerned at first about everyone dropping their hobbies, but at I've been in burn out too, it's helped to take a slower pace this year. And stopping some things allowed time for other things when they came up -like if he hadn't dropped some things he might not have had time for archery when it came up.

    My older one is still doing a lot, but we are in Scotland and it's his P7 year. I think next year when he goes to high school, he'll be more tired and I can see him dropping nearly everything as he adjusts, and that's okay I think.

    I don't know if this helps at all, but it's all a bit of a juggle isn't it?

  • Honestly I think it's part of being a near teenager and growing up, lots of kids, whatever their neurology stop wanting to do things they've enjoyed for years.

    Maybe ask him if theres a different martial art he'd like to do? Or say he can give up swimming or Taekwondo but not both, unless he takes up another physical thing?

    Good luck