Published on 12, July, 2020
I feel although we don’t want to be too strict or authoritarian with our Son, we’ve been too permissive. He is a well behaved child but he has become challenging at home, he isn’t any trouble at school as they use a firm but fair approach, which he responds to. Has anyone else been too lenient because their child has additional needs?
Help your autistic child understand the principles of things both physics (physical) in nature and social.
We learn different as we use language different. Neurotypical children might not need direct instruction on how to make consciously wise decisions or what's socially appropriate as they learn through 'seemingly invisible social codes'. Autistic children will need help understanding the principle behind the behaviour, the timeless ethics, for example. Many of us might even be more inclined to understand the nature of our environment rather than the nature of being human. One can learn both, but not all at once.
Allow your son to express when he's ready to learn a thing, but it will be easier for him to afford respect if he experiences being respected. Encourage his help at home with one thing he feels he would like to do, but often with ADHD and Autistic/ Dyslexic kids, performing a responsibility together is far more useful then creating expectations and leaving them to it. We mature much slower due to a language difference. Be the adult you hope to see them become, this usually provides the best outcome in my experience and understanding.
Permissive and authouritarian are very heavy and judgemental words