Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all,
Looking for a wee bit of advice - if anyone else is in (or has been) in the same boat, or has had similar situations. My son is currently going through a skateboarding phase and is suddenly taking an interest in weather. He hates not being able to go out with his board as he sees the rain as an obstical to do this activity, he currently lives and breaths skateboarding. Although, I am all for encouraging him to be outdoors and getting exercise - however - living near the highlands (I'm near the Glens on the east coast) - the weather is not so great this time of the year. My boy won't stop having meltdowns as a result of not wanting to take his skateboard out in the rain and is struggling to understand that his board won't get ruined straight away - and that nobody can control the weather. He also seems to think that by constantly screaming at me about where he can go to skate that's sheltered and not flooded, and hitting me for good measure, will get me to know where he can go. I have tried countless times sitting down with him in a quiet and relaxed manner and talking to him gently about this, but this only seems to be aggrivating the situation and making him worse. It's so bad that my neighbour shouts out his window telling him to shut up and calls him derogetory names - knowing fine well he has autism and potentially other disabilities. I have tried to explain to him that he can have more than one interest and have tried exploring some examples with him. I am fully aware that it's not as straight forward as that for his brain to understand this.
Can anyone relate to this? How have you helped your autistic with things like this? (I will be bringing all this up to CAMHS when he eventually gets his appointment)
Our intense/reoetitive hobbies and interests offer much certainty in what is for us, a very uncertain world. You said you and your son moved to a new area for a better life. Change - real change not controlled by ourselves - is incredibly difficult even when it is positive. Not being able to engage in interests as a way to mitigate this anxiety must be really difficult for him. I can see it is really difficult for you too. You absolutely want what is best for your son. Sorry I don't have answers.
hello, you sound like you are autistic yourself? sounds like you get it from his point of view! my kid has always struggled to fit in anywhere he goes, I do understand this is a very common thing for autistics, I have friends on the spectrum and have only just started to be able to fit in where they live despite being in their location for a good number of years now, they appear (like my son) to be some of the fewest people in their area to be who they are - or the way they are, with interests like they have - which ever suits the situation best (i'm sure you get what I'm trying to say), in their area, I'm all for supporting my kid in a way thats best for his needs. He is and always has been the number one priority since he was born, i have put my life on hold for him and have missed out on loads (i don't regret sacrificing things), i think how ive put things so far, may have been taken the wrong way by some on here, your the first to take both sides into account,