Frazzled Mum - 4.5 year old girl autism?

Update - Had the meeting with the SENCO at the school yesterday and they were so very helpful and supporting and are going to do everything they can to support us and Elsie.  Although she doesn't show such issues at school, apart from having problems moving from one task to another, their view is that she is likely to be on the spectrum and will continue supporting her as if she is. For next steps, do we go down the diagnosis route? 

Hi, As someone who was only diagnosed at age 25 and who had no idea she could be autistic before then, I would highly recommend getting a diagnosis early. I wish I had been diagnosed sooner- I think it could have saved a lot of upset and allowed me to cope better. It's just good to know- as your daughter gets older she will probably begin feeling more and more that she is different - at least that was what it was like for me. My mum was great in making me feel positive about being 'different' when I was young but the older I got the more marked the differences were and it was hard to deal with- I felt at times like I just needed to try harder etc. and I struggled. Also I think if I had known about being autistic I would have been a lot kinder to myself and maybe I would have learnt at an earlier age how to manage my energy levels and avoid burnout... instead I just muddled along, doing well academically but then struggling more and more with mental health as I got older- I collected lots of diagnoses... none of them properly fit. I now realise I was struggling from burnout at times but I had no idea that was what it was- I kept trying to fix things which probably were just not something that can or should be fixed. It made so much sense when I realised that I might be autistic. When it was first suggested, I initially dismissed it thinking that I really did not need yet another label.... but when I started reading about autism in women it made so much sense - then came the confusion/imposter syndrome phase. But overall I think it just really helps to know. 

Also I think it is just useful to have an official diagnosis in case later on your daughter does need more support whether at school or work or in other ways. And as it takes a long time to get a diagnosis it's risky to wait until you need it. It would give you more safety to have the diagnosis. And if you don't want to, you don't have to tell anyone. It doesn't have to change anything but it is just useful to have.

That's my personal opinion based on my own experiences. 

Hi, As someone who was only diagnosed at age 25 and who had no idea she could be autistic before then, I would highly recommend getting a diagnosis early. I wish I had been diagnosed sooner- I think it could have saved a lot of upset and allowed me to cope better. It's just good to know- as your daughter gets older she will probably begin feeling more and more that she is different - at least that was what it was like for me. My mum was great in making me feel positive about being 'different' when I was young but the older I got the more marked the differences were and it was hard to deal with- I felt at times like I just needed to try harder etc. and I struggled. Also I think if I had known about being autistic I would have been a lot kinder to myself and maybe I would have learnt at an earlier age how to manage my energy levels and avoid burnout... instead I just muddled along, doing well academically but then struggling more and more with mental health as I got older- I collected lots of diagnoses... none of them properly fit. I now realise I was struggling from burnout at times but I had no idea that was what it was- I kept trying to fix things which probably were just not something that can or should be fixed. It made so much sense when I realised that I might be autistic. When it was first suggested, I initially dismissed it thinking that I really did not need yet another label.... but when I started reading about autism in women it made so much sense - then came the confusion/imposter syndrome phase. But overall I think it just really helps to know. 

Also I think it is just useful to have an official diagnosis in case later on your daughter does need more support whether at school or work or in other ways. And as it takes a long time to get a diagnosis it's risky to wait until you need it. It would give you more safety to have the diagnosis. And if you don't want to, you don't have to tell anyone. It doesn't have to change anything but it is just useful to have.

That's my personal opinion based on my own experiences.