Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello,
Just a bit of back ground. I am female and I have two young children my youngest is autistic my eldest son is autistic with a profile of pathological demand avoidance, dyslexic, possible adhd, we have recently sent back conners assessment forms to Camhs.
I very much believe I am autistic but I am scared of reporting my beliefs to the doctor. I’m scared that they may think I’m some sort of hypochondriac and not believe me. I have always been told I depression and anxiety and PTSD. I see a CPN for this but I just don’t feel that we click or she fully understands my fears worries etc. I am on medications also. I sometimes wonder if I do have depression & anxiety as I’ve always felt the way I feel about myself which is doubting everything, needing a lot of reassurance, and avoiding as much situations as I could. Having to write lists down about everything just to remember things or process what I need to buy/do/say. I am severely anxious is social situations which has got worse and worse the older I get I feel totally out of place In society and do things Like walk the long way home to avoid meeting any of my neighbours, looking out of windows to be sure no one is there gardens before I take bins out as I would then be forced into conversations. I regularly wear earphones to drown out the noises of people’s voices and cars when I am out as I feel like it’s drowning me and when my children have melt downs I really struggle with the noise and the behaviours it completely overwhelms me and I wish I could just pause the situation. I have 1 friend who I speak with on the phone fortnightly and I’m pretty happy being on my own as I do have my children. When I was in primary school and secondary I felt forced into situations and basically survived in groups but when it came down to one to one with friends it was awkward as I couldn’t think up conversations and I felt my body and face was sitting awkwardly. I would stutter or just not make sense as I would rush to say what I was thinking but my voice was saying it way faster than I should. I would look away in conversations and feel really uncomfortable. There is also a lot of risk taking behaviours which seemed to have calmed in the past few years. These are just some of the things. I feel very much like I live an act and I am acting when I conversations with my children’s schoo,l nursery, PSA etc it’s sounds stupid but I’m struggle a bit with getting my point across. Hope this makes sense and thank you if you read my post.
Lau :)
I am not a medical profession but here is some facts that i have learned through reading actual books trying understand why i am so different from others. Yes i am autistic adult myself.
Autism and other neurodevelopmental disorder are believed to be genetic so it is possible that you or your partners or both could have autism too. It is also possible for you, your partner or both have a different neurodevelopmental disorder for example Attention deficit disorder, bipolar and other condition like epilepsy could increase the chances of procreating a child with autism as some research and studies have shown but there's still more evidence and research need to be done to confirm it one hundred percent.
Pregnancy and conception is believed to affect but not been confirmed for ethical reasons the likelihood of children being born with autism. mothers with undiagnosed reproductive diseases or underlying autoimmune diseases that can go unnoticed for years has been theorised to be a cause autism. Also it has also been theorized that families with history of Fragile X syndrome, Edwards' syndrome,Prader-Willi Syndrome & Rett Syndrome have an increased chance of having children with autism.
It has been Recorded but not yet disproven Some combined prenatal test have come back positive or have indicated increased chance of child being born with a syndrome such as Edwards syndrome and in some rare cases despite the test proven to be positive for the child to have been born without edwards syndrome and recently there has been connection that has discover that those child born without edwards syndrome but their prenatal test results coming up positive for those children to be diagnosed later in life for autism and Attention deficit Disorder.
You can have Autism and have both depression & anxiety. Yes it is true that some of the autistic traits can appear to look like other conditions such as bipolar, Depression and Anxiety but they can be a secondary symptoms or comorbid conditions with a neurodevelopmental disorder.
Sensory Processing Disorder is commonly comorbid with autism and Attention Deficit DIsorder but it is a separate neurodevelopmental disorder altogether it is possible for you to have sensory processing disorder,
It is quite possible that you have Attention Deficit Disorder which can appear to overlap with autism and even occur comorbidly with autism. But fundamentally autism is mainly characterised but social impairments such as struggling to understand how others fundamentally chose the way to communicate and understanding social cues and lack or misunderstanding of the neurotypical theory of mind and can manifest itself in a range of ways such as individuals not recognising facial expressions.
Personally i recommended you seek a diagnosis for autism but you should also seek a diagnosis for sensory processing disorder and possible attention Deficit Disorder. Depending on you local diagnostic services you may have to have separate assessments for each disorder or if your extremely luck a neurodevelopmental psychologist that diagnosis you with all three. Your Doctor may say "lets deal with one condition at a time" but you want to be on the waiting list for all three i have suggested because the waiting list can be anywhere from 1 year to 6 years in some areas of the UK.
My advice on initiating a diagnosis with a doctors is that you should discuss your theory to them, write a list of supporting evidence on why you believe you might have autism. Some doctors are outdated and un informed still about autism and Attention Deficit Disorder and will try and dismiss you or question why you want a diagnosis and the fact is it will help you understand yourself better, it will help as supporting evidence for any benefit claim or financial aid in the future, Protect you from discrimination in the workplace and help enforce reasonable adjustment in the work and most of all it should give you relief.
Hello Blue,
Thank you for your reply and apologies I have taken a while to respond. Some of the things you have written make a lot of sense and are relevant My eldest child's father was diagnosed with ADHD in his early 30's he also has two cousins on his mothers side who are severely autistic and non verbal .Which may explain a Link between my son and his fathers side but My current partner who is the father to my youngest Child, have no history of mental illnesses or any of the disabilities you have mentioned above. Which makes me believe that there is also a link with myself although there its a lot of young children in my current partners family who we only see for a short time at Christmas.
My youngest had a variety of blood tests taken one of which was for fragile x syndrome all came back negative.
Can I ask why you suggested diagnosis for ADD and Sensory processing disorder? I have tried to find some information online about ADD but all that I could find was linked with hyper activity. I also felt a lot of the information I read was focused around children with sensory processing disorder.
I believe the best way to take this forward with the doctor is to write a list as you suggested and try my hardest to explain why I feel I should be referred for Autism assessment and not jumble up my words and not make sense which I tend to do. I just worry that as I have always put the way I am down to severe anxiety and depression that they may not take me seriously. I just need to find the courage to make the appointment.