Published on 12, July, 2020
I have 3 boys 5, 3 and 1. The eldest is going through the diagnosis process currently as there is a concern he is on the spectrum. My concern currently though is for my 3 yo.
His behaviour is getting worse each day. He constantly wines and cries for me (but not tearful cries). He does make eye contact with me, but it is apparent that he wont with anyone he doesn't know or hasnt built a trusting relationship with. He was having a one to one cuddle with his aunt the other day and went ballistic when I tried to come into the circle too.
He wont let his baby brother anywhere near him and seems to have an irrational phobia of him, our cats and dogs too. But then sometimes if it's in his terms, will happily go up to them to give them kisses or a cuddle. His language is very much delayed, but his older brother was deaf for 2 years before an operation to correct this so he is also p,saying catch up. He does copy alot of th eldest in terms of mimicking actions and speech.
He will have meltdowns constantly if his toy of the week isn't there. Or if we try to get him to do something that we need him to do that he doesn't. Such as getting dressed or even sitting to eat. My family think he and his brother are just naughty and need discipline, but I honestly don't know how to be any more stricter! (Without losing my sanity). I do have to give in to him sometimes just to stop the meltdowns.
He obsesses over certain toys and when he does no one else can touch it. If his brother does for example, he hits him.
I should note that the reasons they are concerned about the eldest is because of his language delay and a couple of other factors. He is actually very sociable, loving and other than him not listening sometimes seems quite normal. But it is very clear that his younger brother has some issues. I have requested for him to be tested but it will take a long time.
Does anyone have advise on how to deal with him and his behaviour in the meantime and also to explain to my family that he isn't being naughty.
It's really hard isn't it? I think my son is on the spectrum and my partner constantly tells me 'not to give In to him' but there's a fine line between what I see as the autistic meltdown and the being a stubborn 5 year old meltdown. Have playschool helped to get him appointments anywhere?