Published on 12, July, 2020
My daughter is a school refuser and is currently spending most days at home isolated and alone. This is really affecting her mental health.
Both myself and my husband work full time and her younger sister attends school.
I really need her to access something that will help her to gain confidence and realise her diagnosis doesn't mean she cant carry on a normal life.
Secondary school has been a very traumatic experience for her and i'm afraid this has broken her.
Thanks.
I must say my daughter is in the same limbo of depression, anxiety and not functioning at all for 4 years, while going through the motions of going to college and failing.
We had a meeting at CAMHS and finally she will be getting some help. But it will take time. I came to the conclusion that my daughter needs CBT, some peer group social activities and proper support at school. Her staying at home in a black hole is my worst nightmare, because it would be even more difficult to engage her. Did you look into specialist residential schools? Did you get any psychology support and more? Nothing will happen unless you bring in some new element. PM
My daughter hasn’t been well enough to consider any other education provider. She does have an EHCP and we have regular update meetings with our SEN lead worker but unless we can somehow integrate her back into the world she continues to feel totally isolated and her anxiety prevents her moving forward.
Don't CAMHS and SEN do anything at all?
CBT, specialist school, or are you home educating?
Hi this is my first time on this page and your situation sounds extremely similar to mine. My 15 year old daughter is also a school refuser to the point where she has been out of education for 3 years. She has suffered and still suffers with anxiety, depression and OCD and like you say her experiences of secondary school, and school in general has left her broken. I haven’t got any answers I’m afraid just wanted to say I feel your pain!
Excellent video, boys and girls talk about their autism.
Autism is awesome https://vimeo.com/216052066
Another good read https://aeon.co/essays/the-autistic-view-of-the-world-is-not-the-neurotypical-cliche
From Sarah Hendrickx
Hi, I am so sorry to hear you daughter is in such a poor state.
I have two daughters on the spectrum. Both developed mental health problems in mainstream schools.
I would think that one thing wouldn't be sufficient to break the cycle, wouldn't lift her out of this situation. This has been my experience, you need a mix of things.. I think you need a holistic programme of helping her to recover, to rebuild herself and get back on track.
Confidence building empowering autism positive resources:
Neurodiversity https://autcollab.org/2018/06/30/taking-ownership-of-the-label/
Social model of disability https://www.scope.org.uk/about-us/social-model-of-disability
Limpsfield Grange girls talking about their autism https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oZhZ0k1lyF8
Greta Thunberg https://www.vox.com/first-person/2019/5/6/18531551/autism-greta-thunberg-speech?utm_campaign=vox&utm_content=entry&utm_medium=social&utm_source=twitter
https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/apr/23/greta-thunberg-autism?CMP=share_btn_tw
Sarah Hendrickx about autistic women (long but good chunks by chunks) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=diE7f6CKj6c
Double empathy problem https://network.autism.org.uk/knowledge/insight-opinion/double-empathy-problem
Focus on autistic problems like theory of mind distracts from seeking two sided understanding https://semioticspectrumite.wordpress.com/2018/01/26/the-belief-in-theory-of-mind-is-a-disability/
Brand new research confirming that ASC/ASC better communicate and collaborate with each other that AS/NT http://dart.ed.ac.uk/research/nd-iq/
On Twitter https://twitter.com/cjcrompton/status/1120321741128118273
Progressive autism info for schools https://annsautism.blogspot.com/2019/05/primary-school-age-child-might-they-be.html
Hi
I've mentioned this before on other threads but have you tried Explorer Scouts? They're very inclusive, 14-18 year olds, adult supervised, controlled social interactions while doing a load of fun & confidence building activities - they're mixed boys & girls and totally accepting of everyone's individuality.
Might be worth a go.