Published on 12, July, 2020
This is my first post here so please bear with me....
It's been a very long journey getting my son's diagnosis as the school have never backed me from day one! No matter what got said it was always said that he was just badly behaved and that that was his learning behaviour that he was expressing.
After lots of assesment and finally am.ados report he recieved a diagnosis of moderate autism but none of it was based on school behaviour or learning problems as they failed to fill out there questionnaire correctly and then never sent in the new one they promised to send in.
My son is now struggling very bad at school, his learning journey is very delayed and he's currently just gone back after a second 3 day exclusion in the space of 6 months. After an awful start to the morning today he was removed from class and told we will give you one more chance to day as mummy is in later with school for a meeting. Thankfully he didn't get excluded but after a very heated meeting regarding me feeling completly let down by the school and I believe the school lieing to me about paperwork etc i was today that he should have been excluded this morning and next time will be if it happens again.
My argument from day one of all these problems is that his needs are not being met well enough so he is then ending up not being able to cope and his behaviour is therefore kicking off.
How is it such a good idea to keep excluding my child :-(
Good Afternoon,
I understand exactly what you are going through, we are having similar problems with the school our 6 year old is at.
He has recently been diagnosed with High Functioning Autism, and he requires one to one support in the classroom, but the school are refusing this, and also refusing to even apply for any additional funding.
We have had numerous meetings at the school, the last following a 4 day exclusion, the Headmaster saying "You son should not be at this school, we do not have the funding or the resources to be able to give him the support that he needs".
He has also been sent home twice before unofficially.
The school put together a PSP plan with us, which we all agreed in December, but they have not implemented hardly any of it.
It is really hard, and the system does not help. We had to go privately to get his assessment and diagnosis, and we have just applied for a EHCP. This is going to take another 20 weeks, and until then, we cannot even think about transferring him to a school that will give him the support he needs, so we are stuck where we are, or move him to another mainstream school, which will be very traumatic for him, and will probably be in the same situation.
It is very hard, and it is amazing how many people are in the same position.
The system is clearly failing our children
Sorry to hear everyones struggles. I also am struggling myself with school and my 6 year old. My childs school have failled to engage him in any learning for over 7 months, he sobs that his ears hurt because of noise in the hall and still is forsed to go, he usually doesnt respond to pain so it must really hurt for him to say. School accept he has asd and we are waiting for diagnostic meeting, ive been assured he will recieve it, after nearly 2 years on the waiting list.
When he was 3 i was told he did not have asd but i was sure and sadly a proffessional that had spoke to me for 10 mins during the assessment decided he was that way becaus i couldnt have bonded with him because he was premature and women who have premeture babies dont bond (she never asked me anything about the birth!)
He was classed as globally delayed and i was accused of not loving and emotionally neglecting him. My son nearly died after birth and i adored him, love at 1st site for me. I was lucky that a few proffessionals believed in me and fought hard. He then went for further assesments and it pointed back to asd.
My son is not coping well at all in school, he becomes violent after being made to go into the hall and then is punnished, i no he is anxouse. My son would never be violent to me and its the extreeme pressure of school and sensory processing ect.
What i find really upsetting is that when my son has a meltdown and becomes violent the school assume its something to do with me, they question bedtimes, my roiteens and say that there must be something stressing him out at home!
I am so frustrated with this, he says to school he hates it there everyday and dreads going so mornings are difficult. Its breaking my heart to see my son being mentally and emotionally destroyed, he is becoming a shadow of who he was.
I see a loving boy at home and if treated with empathy and ridged routines he is happy. Because school arnt coping i feel like there putting it on my shoulders, i love spending time with my son and dont experience this.
hes not aloud 2 after school clubs and im fed up with a school that fails him treating me like a faillier and punnishing my son. Throught his life i have felt without a voice and have lost faith in a lot of people. Im exhasted, i dont think i should be fighting this, i should be enabling my son to thrive, he is clever and i feel like no 1 cares about his education.
Sorry for the lengthy essay! Its really exhausting fighting for my sons basic rights and dont no where else to turn