Published on 12, July, 2020
Its getting worse. Today hes smashed in the wall by throwing a huge computer chair at it. Hes smashed the wardrobe door off the hinges.
We've tried and tried, but any attempt to even speak to him results in literally going from 0 - 1000 in a second. Hes shouts screams and punches the walls.
Today he went for my wife. Next step is going to be the police. We've been here before a month or so ago - took him to A&E out of desperation - they did nothing. All the useless tossers at CAMHS have done is tell us its bad parenting and to ring the police.
Hes 14 a big lad. As I've said before, hes got OCD and possible Aspergers. We've tried it all but he just does what he wants. Hes told his mother he wishes she were dead quite a few times. Last week he told me he was going to ring social services and tell them I was hitting him so I'd get arrested. I just just see it all heading down the slope into oblivion at the moment and he doesnt see it, doesnt care, or doesnt register.
I can't go near him at the moment but hes just a danger at the moment at times - We're so on our own because there is no-one to help!
Prayers answered. CAMHS called this morning and it looks like they're FINALLY going to so something. Also, hes got psychiatrist appt booked for next week to probably up his meds.
Anyway CAMHS are now going to start CBT for his OCD and also start an aspergers assessment. Apparently that takes some time and involces multiple visits?
Been reading about PDA and also Conduct disorder (which is your son welshlass75?). To be honest, PDA sounds very much like him rather than conduct disorder.
Trouble is there are so many of these things.....
I'm sure we do it all wrong though. Its hard not to hold a grudge when he kicks off but I guess if its a mental thing. As I've said a million times. there is no support for parents at all. You feel helpless.
At what point do you punish a teenager and want point do you say "ok we'll see whats bothering you"? As I've always said, in an ideal world everyone has time to sit down and think etc but in the real world we've got jobs, other children etc. Its tough like yesterday to come home to find wife upset, son had pretty much threatened her and he'd thrown a heavy chair and smashed the wall in. Do we make him pay for the damage or let it go?
Thats great news about CAMHS. The only consequenses I could give T was loosing his internet or gaming time, because thats all he cares about. He always had consequenses to his actions. But each day started with a clean sheet.
In my experience you only get help once your child is under police investigation and then you get the condesending "how have you done this for so long, "you are doing a great job" etc etc
I do hope you get somewhere so you can avoid the road we are on.
Yeh I've read about each day starting afresh. Son does really not like losing his PC even for an hour or two.
In the past hes been "banned" more than hes been on it though and it doesnt seem to help. Hes good for a day or two then hes unbanned - then a day later hes off again.
It really is appalling that it gets like this in this country and its got to get to crisis point before you can get any serious help.