Published on 12, July, 2020
I recently experienced something I thought was interesting, and thought it may be worth relaying here. A bit of background information first - I am currently awaiting a Full Assessment for ASD, and one of the things I have always had problems with is understanding verbal instruction.
A few days ago, I was speaking to somebody at my car insurance company, who was giving me information about my car policy, and I was finding it very hard to take in the facts and figures. I explained to the man in the call centre that I was having problems taking in the information, and thought he might not understand what I meant by that, so then told him with a bit of hesitation "basically I'm mildly autistic". He'd been quite helpful before I mentioned autism, but then he asked if I would like him to read out the key points of the policy so I could write them down, which I said would be very helpful indeed. He explained the various details, giving me time to write them down, so I could understand and process them, and respond appropriately. It was such a good experience for me to speak to somebody in this way, and after the call I felt very positive about having understood the information much more clearly. As I sometimes have trouble speaking in the "wrong" places in phone conversations too, I found the space that he gave me in the conversation was less stressful.
However, I must admit to feeling a bit uneasy about claiming I was "mildly autistic", not because I don't feel comfortable thinking of myself in this way - diagnosis would in fact be a comfort - but because I was claiming to be something that (at the moment at least) I'm not. Also, I've heard it said that "there's nothing mild about Autism" - because ASD means so many different things to so many on the spectrum.
If I felt overloaded with information on a phone call again, which is common for me, I'd be tempted to mention autism again, because it helped me to get sense and the relevant details from the call.
I guess what I'm asking here is should I feel at ease doing this again? I suppose it comes down to me wanting to be honest (I've been told many times that I am!).
I'd be interested to know what others think. After my realisation that I may have ASD recently, I'm now in that difficult middle ground until I get my Full Assessment.
I think you received a very commendable response from your car insurance call centre. Actually worth filling in one of their service feedback forms.
Trouble is more often than not the answer is very different. The public have a media perception of any kind of autism as dangerous. I once encountered a workplace health officer who had once worked somewhere where someone allegedly autistic had allegedly groped a work colleague, and for her that was lifetime proof people with autism shouldn't be in the workplace.
And we wonder why it is hard for people with autism find it hard to get or hold down jobs.....
One finds similar attitudes to mental health - most people with a mental health problem have depression, anxiety, an eating disorder or a phobia, but you meet so many people who immediately link mental health condition with axe wielding psychopath.
I think if you are at the able end, disclosure is often less helpful than you would like. Apart from anything else there are still people out there, including GPs who think if you've got a job, or you look OK, you haven't got autism. Autism is still a child curled up in a corner, rocking or banging their head against a wall. If you don't look like that they think you are being silly or a fantasist. There is no comprehension out there about able autism.
I was in hospital seven years ago and was having trouble explaining something and let slip to the nurse that I had Asperger's. She immediately stepped back and said "if you give me their phone number I'll contact your support worker".
When in the context of autism I disclosed to a former MP I had Asperger's his response was "you look normal to me".
The trouble is nobody out there understands autism. You were just lucky to find a decent soul at the end of the phone in that call centre.
Be cautious how and where you disclose. If your autism is more obvious it may well help. But those who don't show it may find disclosure frustrating at best.