Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all :)
You may have seen a topic i prerviously posted very recently about my boys. Im a mom of 3. I have got my one boy through alot of the process to the point they have said its Autism and ADHD but it hasnt been put on paper as yet as hes yet to see a phsycotherapist and my other son hasnt even got to first screening yet. This in mind, I have so many questions, so please forgive me as no matter what i read it seems so vague. My main question being if this is the case, does my nearly 6 year old son know? is he aware of his autism and ADHD? If not when do they become aware of it? do you tell them or do you not say anything at all ( i wouldnt until it was on paper anyway). Also my one son has alot of hitting, bitting to others and himself, he uses baby talk and grunts, these things sometimes make me wonder is all this behaviour completely his condition OR is some of it just an average nearly 6 year olds behaviour? Im very confused. I know alot of the things he does isnt that of someone his age but say like when hes boundary pushing is that the nearly six year old or is it part of the condition or both? the reason i ask this as im so worried about time out if its something that cant be helped, in fact should i be time outing anyway? Im in a place where im questioning everything he does (not to him like i just think is this his way of saying i cant cope or is it him just being a head strong nearly 6 year old?) , im questioning everything we do like should i time out if his behaviour is unacceptable (but then it might not be his fault and so i dont want him to feel misunderstood). I often wonder if he knows as im scared that he might feel alone or isolated and i really dont want that. I mean he seems happy enough until hes in one of his outbursts but i am a worrier and the thought of them feeling misunderstood for even a second turns my stomach. If theres anyone out there with autism / ADHD or both a point of view and advice from you would be greatly appreciated as i just want to understand and do the best for my boys. My boys havent changed overnight and i would like to think that i know them every inch of the way however if theres anything i can do to understand the way they see the world then that can only benefit them surely? thank you for reading my post, and thank you in advance to anyone that can contribute, it means alot. Best Wishes, Lisa :)
Hi again :)
Appointment went well, they're going to see me more to try and get my emotions in check, in my head theres always logic and emotion, people teach you all about logic but they just assume you know all about dealing with you feelings.
Other than having a nice chat to my desk (or Ipod, its called Ipodamee because apparently I'm constantly 'plugged in' to it) there's no other way that I deal with my emotions, I express them through art but apparently that's not always the answer, will hopefully find out the answer soon then. As I said to the psycho, logic is like a game of tetris, sometimes things don't fit and you get gaps but it's always possible to work around them and win the level. But with emotions, its like some nutjob asked picasso to paint the shapes so nothing fits anywhere while you're trying desperately to still win the game.
Eliott sometimes runs up to us and just makes sounds of something he likes, similar to Brad, its kind of like charades but with sounds, usually if he's making 'blub blub blubble' sounds and freaky laughs it means spongebob's on (I don't understand the show, never have, never will, will occassionally poke a stuffed toy in the shops but other than that.... Spongebob: Illogical, does not compute. A sponge, under the sea, that wears trousers and speaks? O.o) or that he's seen something with spongebob on.
One time he came running in to us making strange noises and dragged me (being the eldest) out to the window where I came face to face with a dalek. Now, after about five episodes of Doctor Who, I can safely say everyone else just screamed and ran.
Other kids: DALEK!
Elliot: Exaggimate!
Me:......Dad.....theres a dalek at the window....
Safe to say he thought I was mental at the time until it chased him down the road. Turns out the mechanic that lived down the road was a Doctor Who fan too, and made a life sized remote control Dalek.
I think I know where Brad's coming from in the 'drown out the alarm attempt'. At school they have the bells all over the place, and if I happen to be near them when they go off I'll often cover my ears with my hands and try to drown out the sound by mimicking it, that way I drown it out and other people often don't notice what I'm doing because they can't hear me. I think its more to do with the pitch of the bell than the actual noise, as the pitch really hurts my ears unless I try covering it up with my voice. Fortunately I'm rarely near a bell when it goes off thanks to my speedy walk.
Good luck to Callum and the trip, maybe the toys will keep him distracted long enough so that his brain doesn't have a chance to come up with a reason to 'act out' or get too excited. :)