Published on 12, July, 2020
"It's the most horrible time of the year" I sing this every year. Lol. Christmas is the worst. A horrible nightmare that lasts too long and gets too much hype.
I saw in a shop today they're already selling Christmas sweets, calendars and I saw an advert on TV and it's not even been Halloween yet! But it begs the question...
What are you doing this Christmas?
Undoubtedly I'll have family over. The lights will be too bright. I'll be forced to socialise. And I'll have to go to the Christmas work party. December is a long old month. I hate it. Please someone shoot me with a sleeping dart and let me sleep through it.
At first, after leaving home, I returned to spend Christmas with my mother. She expected it, and I just complied, it didn't occur to me to challenge the idea, and although I actually dreaded it, alternatives of spending Christmas with others was worse. My sibling did the same. One year, when I was a student, it was particularly horrendous... my mum was superficially sociable and insisted on having hordes of her 'friends' round to the house and every year, since a child, this would bring a terrible time for us, with relentless insistence from her that we 'join in' and meltdowns/shutdowns from us...
This particular year, having escaped the house the day after Boxing Day, and run off up the rainy fell, I had a moment of clarity. I thought, I'm not doing this anymore.
And I didn't. Although I was castigated for it, no end. I was a terrible person for not wanting to spend Christmas with my wonderful mother, apparently. But still, the next year I stayed alone in the student house I shared with two other reclusive people. Just me. It was weird at first - but good. After Christmas, I decided to get a little tree and some decorations for it, but that was my only concession to Christmas. I think I had soup and ice cream to eat on Christmas Day.
Since then, I have spent Christmas alone and wouldn't have it any other way. Some years now, I do spend a day or two with my sibling and his family betweenChristmasandNewYear. Since my mum died, I've lived again in my childhood home. It's a very different Christmas for me here now, than when I used to visit for Christmas.
I fully understand the guilt angle, it’s almost used as a weapon. I have a brother and sister, neither invite mother for Christmas, I wait every year to see if either of them do. My sister does the, “We have rented a small cottage by the sea so won’t be about.” My brother lives just in his family bubble. I won’t see her stay on her own so end up inviting her. This year is going to be very strange, my house sale will have completed by Christmas, my wife and I are moving into my childhood home for a year. It’s been my parents home for 55 years. The last Christmas I spent there was 9 years ago, my father was terminally ill and died on the 29th, his sister died suddenly three days before on Boxing Day.
We have got a separate annex so I do have escape rooms. Moving is very stressful, I seem to be at mothers mending something most days, I can see her coming to Cornwall with us when we find the right place. Only problem is, we can only be in the same room for about 20 minutes. I have a customer who is actually going to a remote island for Christmas, camera, binoculars and birds.
I overheard a chef describe Christmas Turkey, “it’s a horrible thing when it’s alive and it’s even worse when it’s dead!”
Roy said:I overheard a chef describe Christmas Turkey, “it’s a horrible thing when it’s alive and it’s even worse when it’s dead!”
Priceless common sense. Priceless.
Thank you for sharing mate.