Bored and lonely and no job

NB: I'm living at home.

Sorry this is a bit long.

I'm a graduate student (I technically graduate in a couple of weeks) living in Plymouth, Devon. I've finished my rather disappointing top up year at university from college where I felt lonely a lot. In college it was easier as the environment was more classroom-like so I could easily chat to people and generally interact. However at university the work was very solo and if I tried to chat to people in the computer rooms they'd just say I was disturbing them Frown. Also due to software incompatability (thanks Adobe) I ended up having to work from home which is a bit lonely.

I had a look at the societies there but there weren't many that suited me. I don't like the pub/nightclub/disco atmosphere at all, unpleasent and dull. I joined Camcru who seemed okay but there was only about 5 events in the whole year which was a bit rubbish and I also joined the (student) vegetarian society there (since I'm a vegetarian) which ran about once a month with meals out at vegetarian food places.

The problem though with a group environment I find is that if there is a crowd of, say, ten or more people talking simultaneously I can't make out a word. I just hear it as noise and cannot join in since I can't pick up on the threads of conversation and can only talk to whoever's nearest to me. This has also finished with the end of the university year.

Right now I'm looking for a job and a life and finding neither. I vaguely know some people here but they do not generally respond to my attempts to contact them and there's noone I can see on a regular basis. I also have no activities to participate in and the absence of anyone to do them with is somewhat dispiriting. I had a look at social clubs and societies here but I can't find anything suitable for me. I want to find, for example, I club where I can experiement with various forms of 3D art and creativity (mixed media) as opposed to painting and drawing which I'm not so keen on. I tried a club at uni in the latter but wasn't that great.

Jobs wise it feels futile as I've been looking around the job sites for a print design something something type job (see my website www.goodwinsanimations.com/) in Plymouth area to no success. It doesn't help that I only have a vague idea of what I'm after or how to keyword it. I don't want a higher up role such as managerial etc. because I'd probably be totally lost.

My friends from London suggested I look for just any shop job but I think that kind of thing would bore me to death, I'm a creative, and I'm probably overqualified with a degree and no shop experience.

I'm a bit stuck now with nothing to do every day and more importantly noone to do anything with. I see groups of people around and just feel lonely. Constantly. Help.

  • I've seen articles about jobs for people on the spectrum. Perhaps more research is needed. Because so few get long term employment it makes it harder to observe what works. At the same time not enough research is done on people at the abler end, whose employment experiences might cross-refer with the practicalities of those with more marked ASC. I don't see why the professionals treat abler people (ON A SPECTRUM) as irrelevant!.

    The drive to get more people on the spectrum into university and perhaps postgraduate study, seems partly with the idea that they can then get a job working in comparative isolation - the boffin in a little laboratory on his own, churning out formulae and drawings.

    Sadly this is rare nowadays. Most work places are teamwork based, and increasingly in open plan offices, which are difficult for people on the spectrum (imposed socialisation, noise, strip lighting, lack of privacy and uncomfortable proximity). However many employers are now favourable towards personal music systems, so everyone has headphones on.

    Engineering is often flagged up as an aspie job, which it still is. Although engineers work in teams, the work is often individual a lot of the time, working constantly on one aspect - such as engineering drawings, or devising algorithms for digital controls, or setting up test procedures. The trouble is it is qute tough to get the engineering qualifications, and means a fairly broad training (lots of things outside comfort zone) even though often never doing work much related to the degree.

    Computing is another option. You can get to work alone, such as testing new systems, or problem solving software and hardware issues. However just because someone on the spectrum is good at computer games, or very deeply into hardware modifications, doesn't mean to say that they can get through the broad range of skills needed for a qualification.

    There have long been problems with students starting a computer course and then finding it too strange and too hard by second year. Also computing changes fast, and you can get stuck in a rut if you cannot train up and move on to new systems. Hence employers if IT staff tend to move them around the jobs so they are skilled across a range of packages or systems, and therefore adaptable to change. That could be difficult for people on the spectrum.

    Similarly skill with numbers doesn't mean an aptitude for mathematics. Most mathematics is theoretical and involves abstract concepts. Some people have this aptitude, but it doesn't seem to be an ASC talent. Being good at number associations is better suited perhaps to accountancy. There's a job which, while often team based, involves a lot iof independent work.

    If you don't need a high salary, but can be content with a liveable wage, there are a lot of jobs mixing manual and academic skills. Parks, gardens and landscaping jobs, and countryside based activities, including rangers - look at the subjects offered in your nearest Agricultural College - might surprise you.

    Another area is cleaning and building maintenance - this still has the stigma of unsocial hours, part-time, low wages, but there are more professional routes through it, and it is a job where you can work independently. Wasytes disposal isn't just binmen - look up the websistite for the Chartered Institute of Wastes Management.

    I hope this helps. I think we need some discussions on what jobs work best for people on the spectrum.

  • Flexibility, openheart, is a difficulty for people on the spectrum. We tend to have a comfort zone, and very quickly become disinterested, uncomfortable or even alarmed when diverging much away from it.

    I'm afraid I'm a little perplexed as to how it defines a country going down the tubes, or that job roles are too flexible.

    The big problem is that in this country we train too narrowly, and the high qualification is a degree, which is mostly overly academic, about writing essays and reports, and being descriptive. It is therefore rather irrelevant to the economy past, present or future.

    Employers groan incessantly about the quality of uk graduates, but it is a fact - the training we offer, at this level, is usually wishy washy academic, lacking application.

    In the rest of Europe they have long had a baccalaureate type system where the higher qualifications can be obtained through experience based practical learning, more effectively directed at employers needs. 

    I myself have long been active in favour of Britain moving that way, through the development of foundation degrees and 14-19 diploma, which sadly has fizzled out.

    What I actually meant by flexibility was the need to consider jobs that tabby499, the originator of this thread, might not actually have considered. That means researching other sorts of jobs, well beyond what he has ever thought about. Because often the jobs you think you'd like to do are over-subscribed with applicants. But there are careers that aren't obvious or well known.

    The difficulty for tabby499 will I guess be moving away from what he thinks he would like, to exploring new possibilities. That's harder for people on the spectrum. It is good advice because many graduates who find good jobs do so by being more adventurous.

    One way to explore the job market is to look at the Sector Skills Councils, recently reorganised by the coalition government, but you can still find links under sector skills councils. These are the areas of professional skills, the training committees etc. Browsing those may be a good way forward.

    Also consider working for a university in student services, library or IT departments, as lots of graduates do, or doing short term research, survey or outreach projects with a local authority. With these sorts of jobs, being seen to be doing well can get you fast tracked into more permanent posts.

    I'm afraid I don't share your view, openheart, of how the country is run.

  • Longman: you talk about quote "Flexibility is crucial nowadays, but it is difficult if you are on the spectrum to compromise your comfort zone", the only for this is due to the capacity in the market (jobs) is below the saturation economical line, in the fact reason every tom, *** and harry goes to University is due to this, so it is lose/lose situation for the employment population and win/win for the blue chip monopolies to get high knowledge workers with minimum cost.

    The UK economical market is based on out-sourcing short termism, but the true economical wealth creation in a country is HYPER-SPECIALISM, non-flexible specialist sector, the problem is the UK economy is not based on creating much specialism, so it is all service jobs which produce nothing but a cycle and when that cycle flux's  due to the shadow banking system, the holding cores of the monopolies are just shedding employee as part of an out-sourcing model, ie zero hour contracts, part-time contracts, agencies etc. So the UK has no real long-term industry, it is just a floating bank.

    Flexibility is a country goes down the tubes. Flexibility conditions for who ?

    Smile

  • Hi Tabby,

    Firstly you're not alone. Someone got this idea that getting more people on the spectrum into university was a good idea - which it is. No-one however seems to have addressed what happens after.

    There is all this effort, not all of it good, as you've found from going to one, to facilitate the pathway for people on the spectrum, though what universities are allowed to do doesn't quite square with what is needed to help people on the spectrum need to facilitate success at university. But no-one seems to have given any thought to what happens after graduation.

    The situation for graduates is generally hard. It is becoming a bit of a myth now to claim that getting a degree will pay for itself wuith higher salaries - there are too many graduates out there earning little better, and often less than they would have got without the degree. Its the law of diminishing returns, the more people you push into universities the less cudos (and salary advantage) to go round. What we should have had in the UK is some equivalent of baccalaureate with a more practical element for the less scholarly, but we seem to be the only country in Europe without that option. So the market is now swamped with graduates.

    I've not long retired as a lecturer and spent many years trying to help undergraduates prepare for the job market. You've got to offer added value (over and above the degree). You've got to be more flexible over what you want to do. You need to be really good at applications and interviews, and make a lot of applications (twenty a week!). You need to be good at researching possible career options and routes in.

    The added value is crucial. With so many doing degrees now a degree is just the ticket to go forwards. You need to offer so much more. This is why sports involvement (team work), leadership, summer jobs, work experience, applicability of your final year project, extra skills etc are what employers look for on application forms.  Trouble is that's much harder for someone on the spectrum, who may not be able to form the sport and social connections. But people on the spectrum can offer skills special to the consequences of that condition - its just the right advice isn't out there. NAS I wish you'd tackle this more.

    Flexibility is crucial nowadays, but it is difficult if you are on the spectrum to compromise your comfort zone. This is something I wish was being addressed while at school. What can you do that's not quite so comfortable but opens new opportunities? I was fortunate I was able to flex and found myself doing things that used my ASC abilities that I'd never have thought of doing. Even with the set-backs of autism, there is a job out there for which you have an aptitude - reaching it is another matter.

    The applications and interviews thing is crucial. Many graduates expect to sail though with maybe one application a week - you'd be miraculously lucky these days - I suggested twenty above, and in some work sectors that's realistic - that's three sent off a day. Get someone to read through your applications and word process design some good CVs. Interviews are also important, but tough on people on the spectrum. You can ask for the interview questions in advance if disclosing disability, and you can sometimes have a person with you to help. It isn't fair asking people on the spectrum to compete with able candidates at what is often a really tough assessment. There's little out there to help people on the spectrum get jobs, yet this stupid coalition government seems to think we should be doing that.

    Finally researching career options. Apart from being more flexible if you can, a lot of good jobs aren't immediately obvious. You need to find oyut about different careers, which is what the careers advisory service at a university is supposed to provide, and which usually fall short of the ideal, and don't know much about autism. Haviong graduated you can go back to the university you graduated from for so many years after for careers help, and if you are not living near that university anymore, sometimes you can negotiate a swap for one more local.

  • Tabby, I assume you have autism ?

    You are at a cross roads, like many people your age, being a vegetarian you are also more likely to be an idealist (according to statistics) so your expectations are high and not getting met good or fast enough.

    You just need a new environment, a day course at college, an art project for one, come on ! think ! Wink I give myself flexible targets, which I work towards, eg,, Travel(this can be anywhere), Socialise(this can be anyone, even talking to a neighbour for 5 minutes), nice house (anything to bright it up), eat healthy( make a nice meal) and lots more targets which are more guides and reminders, there is lots to do, if you focus.

    Just list what you wish out of life and work slowly towards it... step by step.. but Life is not a task nor a puzzle to finish, enjoy your boredom even Laughing

     

  • Hi Tabby

    I am a fair bit older than you (40years old) however your summary of life at Uni sounds just like me 20 years ago.

    Looking forward to chatting more and swapping info