Bored and lonely and no job

NB: I'm living at home.

Sorry this is a bit long.

I'm a graduate student (I technically graduate in a couple of weeks) living in Plymouth, Devon. I've finished my rather disappointing top up year at university from college where I felt lonely a lot. In college it was easier as the environment was more classroom-like so I could easily chat to people and generally interact. However at university the work was very solo and if I tried to chat to people in the computer rooms they'd just say I was disturbing them Frown. Also due to software incompatability (thanks Adobe) I ended up having to work from home which is a bit lonely.

I had a look at the societies there but there weren't many that suited me. I don't like the pub/nightclub/disco atmosphere at all, unpleasent and dull. I joined Camcru who seemed okay but there was only about 5 events in the whole year which was a bit rubbish and I also joined the (student) vegetarian society there (since I'm a vegetarian) which ran about once a month with meals out at vegetarian food places.

The problem though with a group environment I find is that if there is a crowd of, say, ten or more people talking simultaneously I can't make out a word. I just hear it as noise and cannot join in since I can't pick up on the threads of conversation and can only talk to whoever's nearest to me. This has also finished with the end of the university year.

Right now I'm looking for a job and a life and finding neither. I vaguely know some people here but they do not generally respond to my attempts to contact them and there's noone I can see on a regular basis. I also have no activities to participate in and the absence of anyone to do them with is somewhat dispiriting. I had a look at social clubs and societies here but I can't find anything suitable for me. I want to find, for example, I club where I can experiement with various forms of 3D art and creativity (mixed media) as opposed to painting and drawing which I'm not so keen on. I tried a club at uni in the latter but wasn't that great.

Jobs wise it feels futile as I've been looking around the job sites for a print design something something type job (see my website www.goodwinsanimations.com/) in Plymouth area to no success. It doesn't help that I only have a vague idea of what I'm after or how to keyword it. I don't want a higher up role such as managerial etc. because I'd probably be totally lost.

My friends from London suggested I look for just any shop job but I think that kind of thing would bore me to death, I'm a creative, and I'm probably overqualified with a degree and no shop experience.

I'm a bit stuck now with nothing to do every day and more importantly noone to do anything with. I see groups of people around and just feel lonely. Constantly. Help.

Parents
  • I've seen articles about jobs for people on the spectrum. Perhaps more research is needed. Because so few get long term employment it makes it harder to observe what works. At the same time not enough research is done on people at the abler end, whose employment experiences might cross-refer with the practicalities of those with more marked ASC. I don't see why the professionals treat abler people (ON A SPECTRUM) as irrelevant!.

    The drive to get more people on the spectrum into university and perhaps postgraduate study, seems partly with the idea that they can then get a job working in comparative isolation - the boffin in a little laboratory on his own, churning out formulae and drawings.

    Sadly this is rare nowadays. Most work places are teamwork based, and increasingly in open plan offices, which are difficult for people on the spectrum (imposed socialisation, noise, strip lighting, lack of privacy and uncomfortable proximity). However many employers are now favourable towards personal music systems, so everyone has headphones on.

    Engineering is often flagged up as an aspie job, which it still is. Although engineers work in teams, the work is often individual a lot of the time, working constantly on one aspect - such as engineering drawings, or devising algorithms for digital controls, or setting up test procedures. The trouble is it is qute tough to get the engineering qualifications, and means a fairly broad training (lots of things outside comfort zone) even though often never doing work much related to the degree.

    Computing is another option. You can get to work alone, such as testing new systems, or problem solving software and hardware issues. However just because someone on the spectrum is good at computer games, or very deeply into hardware modifications, doesn't mean to say that they can get through the broad range of skills needed for a qualification.

    There have long been problems with students starting a computer course and then finding it too strange and too hard by second year. Also computing changes fast, and you can get stuck in a rut if you cannot train up and move on to new systems. Hence employers if IT staff tend to move them around the jobs so they are skilled across a range of packages or systems, and therefore adaptable to change. That could be difficult for people on the spectrum.

    Similarly skill with numbers doesn't mean an aptitude for mathematics. Most mathematics is theoretical and involves abstract concepts. Some people have this aptitude, but it doesn't seem to be an ASC talent. Being good at number associations is better suited perhaps to accountancy. There's a job which, while often team based, involves a lot iof independent work.

    If you don't need a high salary, but can be content with a liveable wage, there are a lot of jobs mixing manual and academic skills. Parks, gardens and landscaping jobs, and countryside based activities, including rangers - look at the subjects offered in your nearest Agricultural College - might surprise you.

    Another area is cleaning and building maintenance - this still has the stigma of unsocial hours, part-time, low wages, but there are more professional routes through it, and it is a job where you can work independently. Wasytes disposal isn't just binmen - look up the websistite for the Chartered Institute of Wastes Management.

    I hope this helps. I think we need some discussions on what jobs work best for people on the spectrum.

Reply
  • I've seen articles about jobs for people on the spectrum. Perhaps more research is needed. Because so few get long term employment it makes it harder to observe what works. At the same time not enough research is done on people at the abler end, whose employment experiences might cross-refer with the practicalities of those with more marked ASC. I don't see why the professionals treat abler people (ON A SPECTRUM) as irrelevant!.

    The drive to get more people on the spectrum into university and perhaps postgraduate study, seems partly with the idea that they can then get a job working in comparative isolation - the boffin in a little laboratory on his own, churning out formulae and drawings.

    Sadly this is rare nowadays. Most work places are teamwork based, and increasingly in open plan offices, which are difficult for people on the spectrum (imposed socialisation, noise, strip lighting, lack of privacy and uncomfortable proximity). However many employers are now favourable towards personal music systems, so everyone has headphones on.

    Engineering is often flagged up as an aspie job, which it still is. Although engineers work in teams, the work is often individual a lot of the time, working constantly on one aspect - such as engineering drawings, or devising algorithms for digital controls, or setting up test procedures. The trouble is it is qute tough to get the engineering qualifications, and means a fairly broad training (lots of things outside comfort zone) even though often never doing work much related to the degree.

    Computing is another option. You can get to work alone, such as testing new systems, or problem solving software and hardware issues. However just because someone on the spectrum is good at computer games, or very deeply into hardware modifications, doesn't mean to say that they can get through the broad range of skills needed for a qualification.

    There have long been problems with students starting a computer course and then finding it too strange and too hard by second year. Also computing changes fast, and you can get stuck in a rut if you cannot train up and move on to new systems. Hence employers if IT staff tend to move them around the jobs so they are skilled across a range of packages or systems, and therefore adaptable to change. That could be difficult for people on the spectrum.

    Similarly skill with numbers doesn't mean an aptitude for mathematics. Most mathematics is theoretical and involves abstract concepts. Some people have this aptitude, but it doesn't seem to be an ASC talent. Being good at number associations is better suited perhaps to accountancy. There's a job which, while often team based, involves a lot iof independent work.

    If you don't need a high salary, but can be content with a liveable wage, there are a lot of jobs mixing manual and academic skills. Parks, gardens and landscaping jobs, and countryside based activities, including rangers - look at the subjects offered in your nearest Agricultural College - might surprise you.

    Another area is cleaning and building maintenance - this still has the stigma of unsocial hours, part-time, low wages, but there are more professional routes through it, and it is a job where you can work independently. Wasytes disposal isn't just binmen - look up the websistite for the Chartered Institute of Wastes Management.

    I hope this helps. I think we need some discussions on what jobs work best for people on the spectrum.

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