Does any one feel more isolated as they grow older?
From a personal point of veiw I just can't seem to go where I want to go in life. I'm feel totaly isolated for numerous reasons, some in part that I just don't fit in with anyone no matter how much I try. Secondly because I struggle to conform, and that just makes people run a mile. Thirdly I was raised on a really deprived council estate (although I was lucky enough to have working parents and not in that boat), but my intellectual level is higher that the people I knew from childhood, but I don't seem to get a long with academics or wealthier people.
I feel completely adrift from the rest of world, and this feeling seems to grow stronger with age. I sometimes wonder about ending it all, but I don't really feel depressed or ar least I don't understand I feel depressed.
In many ways I feel like I can't be bothered walking against the wind but spending the last year trying not to do such. I've shaved of my hair that was below my shoulder blades, I've shaved off my beard that had about 11" of growth, I've lost three stone. I've stopped enjoying recreational alcohol consumption. I've started teeth grinding and have consistend mouth sensations as a result. I feel persicuted from all angles of political thought, I just see them all as variations of right wing extremists.
Sorry for blurb. Just needed a moan.