What made you realise you have/might have autism?

Like others here I always considered myself different but recently read about Vice Admiral Nick Hine (easily Googled). Never heard of him before, didn't know him, but it was like reading an extended analysis of my own personality.  It was me. He was me. I had nothing in common with the man, I’ve never met him, it’s unlikely that I ever will, but in some weird way, he was me.  Spookily, creepily, me. 

I'd always dismissed autism thro ignorance (I've had a pretty successful career, so obviously, I wasn't autistic, right?). But once the suspicions had settled, one thing led to another, and (like a lot of people with autism) I read-up on it in huge detail - perhaps a bit obsessively, with hindsight.  Not just books and articles but peer-refereed academic papers.  It all reinforced my suspicions. 

Self-diagnosis or guesswork wouldn't work for me - just a personal thing, doesn't apply to everyone - so I had to know. I needed an objective, clinical assessment.  NHS assessments take years, apparently, so I did it privately with a service approved by my GP and at the age of 64 discovered that I was, indeed, autistic.  So-o-o-o many cogs dropped into place and so much of the past began to make sense.  Bit sobering, still taking it in, but at least I know.  

I guess the answer to your question ('what made you realise?') is personal testimony.  I've always believed that two of the most powerful words in the English language are 'for example' and that seems particularly true in the case of an autism diagnosis.  Autism is different for everyone but if you recognise yourself in someone else's 'this is me' autism story that's going to engage your attention. I have never been in the Royal Navy, had little to do with the services, and on so many levels have nothing in common with Nick Hine; I suspect (but don't know) that much separates us; and yet in so many other ways, his life experience was mine.

I think a lot of storytelling needs to be done to bust the mythology; the entire topic is full of tropes, cliches, misleading generalisations and misused terminology (like "Asperger's").  Credit to the Admiral for speaking out - I took it further, because I saw myself in him.   

My memories of childhood are also fragmented and I wonder if I subconsciously don't want to remember some things. A lot of it is quite personal and difficult, and I wouldn't relate it here; but looking back on it, it all fits.  I was about where you are six months ago.  Whatever decision you make, good luck with it. 

Like others here I always considered myself different but recently read about Vice Admiral Nick Hine (easily Googled). Never heard of him before, didn't know him, but it was like reading an extended analysis of my own personality.  It was me. He was me. I had nothing in common with the man, I’ve never met him, it’s unlikely that I ever will, but in some weird way, he was me.  Spookily, creepily, me. 

I'd always dismissed autism thro ignorance (I've had a pretty successful career, so obviously, I wasn't autistic, right?). But once the suspicions had settled, one thing led to another, and (like a lot of people with autism) I read-up on it in huge detail - perhaps a bit obsessively, with hindsight.  Not just books and articles but peer-refereed academic papers.  It all reinforced my suspicions. 

Self-diagnosis or guesswork wouldn't work for me - just a personal thing, doesn't apply to everyone - so I had to know. I needed an objective, clinical assessment.  NHS assessments take years, apparently, so I did it privately with a service approved by my GP and at the age of 64 discovered that I was, indeed, autistic.  So-o-o-o many cogs dropped into place and so much of the past began to make sense.  Bit sobering, still taking it in, but at least I know.  

I guess the answer to your question ('what made you realise?') is personal testimony.  I've always believed that two of the most powerful words in the English language are 'for example' and that seems particularly true in the case of an autism diagnosis.  Autism is different for everyone but if you recognise yourself in someone else's 'this is me' autism story that's going to engage your attention. I have never been in the Royal Navy, had little to do with the services, and on so many levels have nothing in common with Nick Hine; I suspect (but don't know) that much separates us; and yet in so many other ways, his life experience was mine.

I think a lot of storytelling needs to be done to bust the mythology; the entire topic is full of tropes, cliches, misleading generalisations and misused terminology (like "Asperger's").  Credit to the Admiral for speaking out - I took it further, because I saw myself in him.   

My memories of childhood are also fragmented and I wonder if I subconsciously don't want to remember some things. A lot of it is quite personal and difficult, and I wouldn't relate it here; but looking back on it, it all fits.  I was about where you are six months ago.  Whatever decision you make, good luck with it. 

and the truth will be revelead, it's like that I think for most of autistic

looking at a photo it seems you would like my friend, he's is self-learnt dog's shrink, he's lovely adopted staffy buldog Princess