Insensitive or over reacting

hi ck - Sorry - I feel a long post coming on!  Obviously I don't know you or your friend or the children, so bear that in mind.  Perhaps... and only perhaps, it's a bit of both?  She happily reels off her son's achievements + you compare him with your son.  I've often sat with friends over the yrs and felt rather like you.  The thing is, tho, that her son has it easier than yours.  When my son was 18 we got a new sw.  We were chatting about him.  I was telling her when he 1st started talking (at 5 yrs old), how he enjoyed sporty things, how he was practical, his sense of humour, his various other interests:  music, tv, dancing.  My son isn't asperger.  He hasn't passed gcse's.  When I paused, she said "you must be very proud of him".  She recognised the hurdles he'd had to surmount.  He has a good quality of life in supported living with gd staff.  So there's loads of time for you and his school to develop his talents.  He may possibly go to uni as Apple says, or college, or he may not.  Many people don't for various reasons.  My son has people he likes, people he's not bothered about + people he doesn't like. He doesn't make friends but his insight is such that it doesn't bother him the way it might bother another person on the spectrum.  He's much younger than his yrs  and isn't introspective.  So you don't know how things will develop sometimes.   You'll be the most important person in his life, know how asd affects him and you'll be there to help when he needs it.  He's already a little hero. 

hi ck - Sorry - I feel a long post coming on!  Obviously I don't know you or your friend or the children, so bear that in mind.  Perhaps... and only perhaps, it's a bit of both?  She happily reels off her son's achievements + you compare him with your son.  I've often sat with friends over the yrs and felt rather like you.  The thing is, tho, that her son has it easier than yours.  When my son was 18 we got a new sw.  We were chatting about him.  I was telling her when he 1st started talking (at 5 yrs old), how he enjoyed sporty things, how he was practical, his sense of humour, his various other interests:  music, tv, dancing.  My son isn't asperger.  He hasn't passed gcse's.  When I paused, she said "you must be very proud of him".  She recognised the hurdles he'd had to surmount.  He has a good quality of life in supported living with gd staff.  So there's loads of time for you and his school to develop his talents.  He may possibly go to uni as Apple says, or college, or he may not.  Many people don't for various reasons.  My son has people he likes, people he's not bothered about + people he doesn't like. He doesn't make friends but his insight is such that it doesn't bother him the way it might bother another person on the spectrum.  He's much younger than his yrs  and isn't introspective.  So you don't know how things will develop sometimes.   You'll be the most important person in his life, know how asd affects him and you'll be there to help when he needs it.  He's already a little hero.