I was bored and not happy here
I am sure we all like you here.
We all care about you.
We do... how are you California?
I received another friendship request from Rachael.
I just do not know what to do with them.
Do others get friendship requests from Rachael?
I haven’t ... you don’t have to accept them and you can also take time deciding, ok
“California 13 hours ago in reply to ElephantInTheRoomI received another friendship request from Rachael.
Do others get friendship requests from Rachael?”
Hi California I received possibly the first friend request from Rachael, maybe as I was the first to welcome her here, I did not accept it as I felt being an older Male I would not be a good choice of friend, I would not have similar interests as her I think?
I said before that I have seen similar use of sentences by actual people on here, I chose to try and communicate with one person in the same way they tried to speak, it took some time but eventually it gave that person an ability to start to be more confident in using the internet chat forums, I very much had to imagine just what they were attempting to say, once a common understanding was achieved and by both the conversations became easier in that a certain amount of trust was gained.
If I am wrong about Rachael then I see no harm from it, I do not intend giving her any personal information or click on any links, or respond to requests for pictures or email addresses.
She has asked for specifics things which are against forum rules, I have never bothered to read the rules as I hope just being me is sufficient to not break rules which are both for the safety of others as well as myself. I may inadvertently break them, I also wonder just how many actually read all the rules when joining here?
I have read all the comments to Rachael but have not seen anyone Say they accepted or requested friendship, her profile shows no friends added, I know some have asked her to be more open on here and to respond to things they ask, if I were told to reply in such a way I might just want to run away or maybe start another thread in an attempt to distance myself from a query I didn’t either like or want to reply to, it is called being afraid or wary as all this is new and not fully understood,
many attempted to ask questions, she didn’t reply to most, maybe she was trying to focus on just one not a group? She looked for someone that was similar in wants and possible likes as herself,
so although she is seemingly struggling to communicate she is changing what she says to suit how others are responding to her , it is called learning forum etiquette and the rules as she goes along.
I wait to see if Rachael keeps trying her best to communicate or wether she gives up because of the ever increasing dismissal from many of who she is, even what she is.
take care all, learn that to respond to anyone for friendship should be done with great care,learn about the individual first by following the replies they use when communicating on the open forum.
I wish everyone happiness and be safe, that includes Rachael.
I also wait to be told how very wrong my words are, I call that individuality and the ability to have free thoughts, I am just me, I often do things which to many would indeed seem wrong. I am human and I like to think possess humility.
Lonewarrior said:many attempted to ask questions, she didn’t reply to most, maybe she was trying to focus on just one not a group? She looked for someone that was similar in wants and possible likes as herself,
At one point at the beginning she was so focused on me. She only talked to me.
She kept asking for pictures.
I must say that I am not interested in her in the way that would justify sending her pictures.
However, if she would be someone else, I might send the pictures.
This is really scary.
How do you know when to send pictures and when not to send them?
Hi California, may I suggest you not send pictures of yourself to anyone, not at least until you have talked to them a long long time,shared interests, read how they interact on here with others,
Pictures maybe of things not connected in a personal manner maybe?
others will advise on that maybe better.
I certainly wouldn’t send any pictures of myself unless the person was so very special indeed, that special person would have to have shown me understanding and truly care for who I am, which would be a reciprocal thing, shared understanding built up over many months maybe,
be fareful California.
Thank you very much for the comment.
This makes sense.
Lonewarrior said: I certainly wouldn’t send any pictures of myself unless the person was so very special indeed, that special person would have to have shown me understanding and truly care for who I am, which would be a reciprocal thing, shared understanding built up over many months maybe,
This is a good advice. However, I am not sure if I would have the patience to wait for many months. That's a long time.
I find one thing strange.
People post the pictures of them on the dating sites all over the place.
Posting pictures on the dating sites is considered one of the things that increases the chance of finding someone as no one wants to talk for a long time with someone they cannot see.
So, my question is.
Why should we guard our images here and not to post them if it is perfectly normal to post them on the dating websites? What is the difference really? I find it difficult to grasp the difference.
I am only me and therefore what I say or think will most probably be wrong,,,,On a dating website I imagine much of the people looking to meet up are looking for looks in a person as most first judge by looks alone,then move onto what is in the mind,a sense of humour is considered very important by some.
I am not sure I would visit a dating website as no matter what my looks are once they get to know what is in my head they may not firstly understand me and secondly miss the chatter or small talk most expect.
So being on here is I imagine firstly not about dating, friendship maybe if two share common beliefs or in our case traits, it allows a unique understanding that is only to be truly found between two like minds,
words are not always needed whenbtwo come together and connect inacway like never before.
anyway, some members here are not used to how things are out there in the chaotic world called NT land, It would be very easy to be taken advantage of, hence why NAS say not to post any personal details,
take care California, be a little guarded, if somebody really wants to be friends then lots of talking will be expected and fine, image is really not important, it is what’s inside the mind that makes a person.
Thank you for the comment.
I completely agree with you.
It is more important what in the mind is for me, as well.
However, if I do not have the picture, I tend to imagine how the person might look like. Obviously, close to something I tend to find to be attractive to me.
For some reason, I almost never ask for the pictures first. If someone does want to provide, I do not ask. I just tend to imagine how the person might look like. I even enjoy this imagining thing.
So, it might come as a big shock to me after the several months if there is a big difference between the two.
Lonewarrior said:they may not firstly understand me and secondly miss the chatter or small talk most expect.
I have exactly the same problem.
I think I would enjoy a lot more simply sitting in and enjoying the silence together than trying to force chatter or small talk as I am horrible at them. If we have nothing to discuss, then silence is much better than talking something pointlessly.
As I tend to get sensory overloads from noises, I really would enjoy and get pleasure being with someone I like in silence as I am less anxious and more able to enjoy being with someone.
Lonewarrior said:She has asked for specifics things which are against forum rules, I have never bothered to read the rules as I hope just being me is sufficient to not break rules which are both for the safety of others as well as myself. I may inadvertently break them, I also wonder just how many actually read all the rules when joining here?
I was a bit frustrated that I had to look for the community rules after I had joined here as a community member, as I prefer to know what is what legally before I sign up to anything.
Currently, if anyone wishes to read the community rules, they can be accessed via the Terms and Conditions link at the bottom left of each page, as being second to last under the heading Useful Links .
Or else by the following link: