Losing the will to live !

I really don't know where to start with this one! So let me introduce myself.  My name is Laura I'm a  single mummy to 3 boys age 15, 12, 11. My middle son who is 12 I've been struggling with since he was 18 months old. He never spoke until he was nearly 4..woukd point to things rather than say . That turned into him only eating or drinking off the same cups or plates , would have a melt down if you tried to give him a anything  else. Which then turned into him having colour days where he would insist on wearing a certain colour that day and nothing else otherwise it would cause a tanturum. To him having a melt down if you went  another way home from nursery without prior warning . To not being able to go into supermarkets etc. So we ended up at speech and language to be refered to child psychology.. After a few appointments being told I'm the bad parebt doing my job wrong and not being able to tell my son no..

By this time were struggling to have a hair cut as he only feels safe having hair over his ears, don't like loud noises , won't keep clothes on and won't wear anything at all that feels scratchy on his skin. To spinning and constantly watching the same thing over and over and over again , lining up dolls over and over again. And just doing very repetitive things that if you try disturb cause a tantrum..

So I ended telling the child psychologist to do one as I felt it did not help and I was getting nowhere. So for the last 10 years I can say I've delt with things on my own..its been a hard struggle but now I'm and breaking point .. at 12 years old and 6f 3 he is becoming more and more difficult to deal with .. He is now lashing out at me ! Swearing , still running about with no clothes on . And since having a hair cut won't go anywhere without a towel on his head or a wolly hat at school! We have seen cams who have refered us to the umbrella path way. But right now while I'm waiting for them I'm feeling really lost as a parent.  Any advice right now would really help.  

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