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Suicide post

NAS70780

Thank you to those who replied, your comments showed I mattered. Unfortunately my post was deemed as abusive by a community member There is nothing in my post that was hurling abuse to others, if I was critical about anything it was towards myself. Deeply saddening that at my most vulnerable I reach out to a forum seeking guidance regarding my dark thoughts and securing guidance how I may come out of this rumination, yet the very forum who has any understanding of autism/aspergers considers my personal experience to be abusive, the irony, the oxymoron application of today's society means I am further prevented in securing the guidance this disability needs, unmet needs are further encountered with trickery steps, ordinary life is difficult to navigate and naively I thought seeking help on this platform would be safe.

Parents

  • I don't agree with the removal, and just want to voice my support to you.

    I was writing my reply while it got removed. I hope it is fine to still add what I remember of it. The questions I had were (I may edit them if I can remember more):

    1. Was I reading correctly that you feel useless, and demotivated? Maybe because of the previous work experiences (like a PhD, I think you mentioned) ?

    2. Is there any external pressure that you could lift off your shoulders, that would make things easier? Won't fix things, but can make them less bad, as a starting point.

    3. Do you have any hobbies that you feel like doing even now?

  • in reply to Deleted User

    And lastly, do you have access to a psychologist? Mine -but I was lucky- has helped me incredibly.

  • in reply to Deleted User

    I need to find the strength to see the gp, I have been meaning to do this for a while, but I can only get a ten minute appointment, and I simply don't know where to start. Alternatively I can see if there is private help, but I would rather speak to an autism specialist. I just feel if I talk to anyone else, I have to explain what I am thinking and then the emotion, yet here like I am doing now it appears you all understand and that I'm not suffering from madness (as it appears you too have experienced similar severity of suffering). Equally with managing financial i cannot afford to swap and change professional help, and the idea of finding a suitable counselor and the work involves, just makes me want to curl up and just fade.

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  • in reply to Deleted User

    I need to find the strength to see the gp, I have been meaning to do this for a while, but I can only get a ten minute appointment, and I simply don't know where to start. Alternatively I can see if there is private help, but I would rather speak to an autism specialist. I just feel if I talk to anyone else, I have to explain what I am thinking and then the emotion, yet here like I am doing now it appears you all understand and that I'm not suffering from madness (as it appears you too have experienced similar severity of suffering). Equally with managing financial i cannot afford to swap and change professional help, and the idea of finding a suitable counselor and the work involves, just makes me want to curl up and just fade.

Children