Published on 12, July, 2020
My anxiety is getting worse I feel like I'm at breaking point. I'm always terrified. I'm always fearing the worst. I feel the urge to wash my hands all the time, I wake up in the middle of the night and wash them. They are very very red and painful now and burn a lot. I've taken to wearing gloves because the coolness of the air burns them. They tremble as well, I think that's the anxiety. They always used to tremble every now and then but now it's all the time.
I feel sick a lot, no appetite and I get moments where I feel faint. I have a diagnosis of generalized anxiety disorder I know it's that but it adds to the anxious feelings. My thoughts are always anxious and I don't leave the house not unless it's to go in the garden for some air.
And now today, worst yet my hair has gone white. I'm so sad right now. I'm only 26 and my hair is white. I've always been pale that I could cope with but now my hair is white. It looks horrible.
I thought of calling my doctor but I haven't been out since the first wave of covid and I don't feel ready to go out now. I don't know what to do.
Lorna x
I'm sorry that you are having a rough time. I would probably try and start with small steps, rather than trying to take all of that on in one go.
So I would try and ring a doctor and try to either speak to the surgery by telephone or even suggest a home visit.
When it comes to the handwashing, perhaps see if you can build up the time between washing them - so maybe see if you can go an hour without washing them. Or reduce the number of times you wash them during the night. One thing I found useful when giving up smoking was to tell myself 'ok, you are desperate for a cigarette, see if you still are in 10 minutes' - normally I'd forgotten by then.
Maybe try and build up your eating over time - perhaps write a food diary over the course of a week.
It's good that you are ok to go into the garden - try and make the most of that, especially in the summer. Treat yourself to 10 minutes in the garden where you just sit and watch whatever is there. It works for me when I am stressed.
There are things you can do with your hair, but I'm guessing that if you start, step by step, in tackling some of the other issues, that won't be so much of a worry.
I'm not trying to patronise you with any of the above - just some thoughts on little steps you could take that may help.