Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone. I am a 61 year old male whom others often think of as having strange habits and strange ideas. I am also 'stuck in my ways'. I find that I am frequently misunderstood and have problems with spoken communication at times. For example when someone asks 'How are you', not knowing what to say so I'll say something like 'I'll live'. I am very abrupt with answers, often resorting to one or two words and not carrying on the conversation. I speak inappropriately at the wrong times in meetings, play unnecessarily with, for example, paper cups to the annoyance of others without realising what I am doing and am often talking to myself.
Conversely, once I get going on a topic that I have an interest in, I talk the hind legs off a donkey, not knowing when to stop and boring the pants off the recipient of my talk. Job interviews have always been a problem, I have been told I do not engage enough eye contact and either fidget a lot or sit bolt upright with my arms folded. I have failed so many job interviews that I am a candidate for the Guinness Book of Records. This led to a l-o-n-g period of unemployment lasting twenty years from my twenties to my forties.
Recently, my job changed- I used to work as a data manager but having been Tuped over it changed to an office administrator. I cannot work how I would like and I know there are better ways of doing things but I am not allowed to do them the way I want (I am very computer literate). This has caused problems with accuracy by working in a way that is not how I like to work and also there are so many interuptions that I find it difficult to complete the tasks and it has caused so much stress and anxiety that I am now on long term sickness for stress manifesting itself in anxiety and depression.
I strongly suspect I may have Aspergers. Some time ago I took the Aspergers Test (self took, not with a doctor) and got a score of 42. Taking it again recently had the same result. I am aware that self tests are not necessarily accurate but I think a lot of my experiences fit in with Aspergers. I have been trying to convince my GP to refer me for a proper assessment but it is so far falling on deaf ears. I believe an assessment if positive would provide me with a strong case for adjustments at work so that I can better cope. What do others think?
You see, just because someone does not necessarily qualify as 'clinically' Aspergers does not mean they don't have day to day problems and issues deriving from having some autistic traits. We have to remember that it is a spectrum condition and, as such, there will always be a 'cut-off' off point at which the medical criteria will determine whether someone gets an official diagnosis or not.
I can understand the need to help people who are experiencing real and urgent problems due to being autistic and the lack of provision for treatment but does that then mean others, who are still significantly impacted, are left to get on with it as best they can? Presumably, such individuals are expected to make their own arrangements in gaining some kind of professional help and advice which is not always an easy thing to do.
I think there must be many people who are in fact on the AS but have remained undiagnosed for many years, partly because they never realized they had this condition or that there has never been much help available on the NHS. They may well have seen a GP about things like anxiety and depression but their Aspergers was not picked up so the person never got to know about their real issues.