Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, just wanted to say hello to everyone! V long story short, been trying to get one of my twin daughters an ASC diagnosis since she was 2 1/2, (she's now 7). we saw numerous professionals, the most helpful of whom were the SALTS, who indicated that there was definitely something that needed assessing (they aren't allowed to state a diagnosis)! whereas everyone else seemed to think I was being a fussy mum. Saw several Community paediatricians who kept leaving so we had to go back to the start of the process again. Moved schools because they weren't supportive and finally had an ADOS a few months ago with a very inexperienced CP, which she passed with flying colours given how high functioning she is. Also had to fill in a Connors questionnaire, ours showed her above 70% threshold in all but one category and because she's v well behaved at school, the CP completely disregarded them. School have said her twin is also showing autistic traits but she presents very differently. School is trying to get info together to do a re-referral themselves. I just feel SO frustrated as everyone just seems to pick and choose the evidence they use ie school's, not me as the parent who is coping with daily meltdowns. Times two. I can't fault the school, who are being so supportive, it's the diagnostic system that feels like a brick wall to be broken down. Anyone got a magic hammer?! What's worse is, I'm probably going to have to go through all this again with the other twin! Sorry to go on but it's just a build up of 5 years of frustration.
Firstly, well done for working it out and pursuing it to the right conclusion. Hugs to her and I hope you find that the diagnosis helps.
I have some sympathy for the professionals - if you have watched the Born Naughty series on Channel 4 it is quite difficult to separate bad behaviour and upbringing from a diagnosable problem like autism. Also, the whole mental health system is based on trial and error - it just isn't possible to think in the same terms of precision that we expect from the physical health system where an X-ray or blood test can give a very confident diagnosis.
I don't think that there isn't much point in being angry - I know this is easier said than done but don't let it hurt you. Always try to look forwards rather than backwards.
I don't mind being geeky! I don't think of it as being a critical term because, in my mind, it implies being clever and different.