20yr old m son with aspergers... i cant cope!

The stalling points for people on the spectrum going to college or university are quite puzzling and quite complex.

Parents lose control of the situation, which they may have had right through school, because the lecturers are usually not allowed to talk to parents (breach of confidentiality) and I'm not sure disability support staff sufficiently understand the issues that can arise. Consequently a lot of good experience never gets set down.

In school the teaching environment is regulated, its the areas out of sight of the teachers that are hardest to cope with, although poorly trained teachers, as regards autism understanding, can do more harm than good.

In a university the time away from staff is a whole lot safer, but the staff-student interface is tricker. This should have been resolved by now, but the "level playing field/social model of disability tends to exclude the lecturers and tutors, who are supposed to walk in-talk and walk out, and leave the support to student services. It doesn't work, not least because the teaching staff are also the assessors, rather than some remote exam board.

Particularly most universities still argue that all students must meet all the learning outcomes - no exceptions. It is just that students on the autistic spectrum often cannot deliver to that level of rigour. You have to write assignments in a certain way, argue a case with evidence, demonstrate a thought process or an investigative process. These concepts are devilishly hard for autistic students to fathom. OK many non-autistic students struggle with this, but it is particularly cruel for those with autism.

You cannot just spout knowledge - lots of information, or miraculously quick thinking out and getting answers, or a lot of aptitudes that autistic spectrum students may bring to university. I have astounding recall. I can reproduce tables and diagrams from memory in exams. I did great in first year then started to get into difficulties because I didn't latch on to the fact I needed to demonstrate procedures and rules of thought. It took me a long time to master this. Many students on the spectrum are completely thrown by this - they see it as unnecessary or illogical. If they keep resisting they quickly get into trouble. A common reason for university drop outs with autism is not being able to complete assignments. They just do what they think is getting the answer, and ignore what they are expected to do.

Related to this a lot of students fall down picking the wrong degree. An aptitude for numbers is not enough to do mathematics, especially pure maths, which is so abstract and theoretical that it seems to be bad for people with autism. Just because someone is really good at computer games doesn't make them obvious candidates for a computing degree. You have to do all kinds of aspects of computing to complete a course, and computing is notorious for the number of autism failures. I wish I could convince parents to be especially wary of these two subjects.

University teaching is increasingly about challenge. The old style long tedious lecture, with some old duffer droning on, has gone out of fashion. Lecturers are supposed to challenge, confront, baffle and inspire students, and increasingly they try to do this through discussion groups and group projects where the students work through problem solving exercises to learn the concepts hands on. Group work equals hazardous for autistic spectrum students. But even lecturers who talk through the material can be much more aggressive and provocative - that can be hard on students on the spectrum.

I repeatedly express concern here - though I doubt NAS decision makers are listening/reading my missives, that there is insufficient understanding of the university teaching environment and the effect it can have on students on the spectrum. Some thrive on it, others hit the wall in second year if not third year.

Therefore I think it is worth trying to find out, from talking to your son, what it was that caused him to drop out.  It might help. I think a lot of students who drop out don't understand why they seemed to fail, and it hurts them badly

The stalling points for people on the spectrum going to college or university are quite puzzling and quite complex.

Parents lose control of the situation, which they may have had right through school, because the lecturers are usually not allowed to talk to parents (breach of confidentiality) and I'm not sure disability support staff sufficiently understand the issues that can arise. Consequently a lot of good experience never gets set down.

In school the teaching environment is regulated, its the areas out of sight of the teachers that are hardest to cope with, although poorly trained teachers, as regards autism understanding, can do more harm than good.

In a university the time away from staff is a whole lot safer, but the staff-student interface is tricker. This should have been resolved by now, but the "level playing field/social model of disability tends to exclude the lecturers and tutors, who are supposed to walk in-talk and walk out, and leave the support to student services. It doesn't work, not least because the teaching staff are also the assessors, rather than some remote exam board.

Particularly most universities still argue that all students must meet all the learning outcomes - no exceptions. It is just that students on the autistic spectrum often cannot deliver to that level of rigour. You have to write assignments in a certain way, argue a case with evidence, demonstrate a thought process or an investigative process. These concepts are devilishly hard for autistic students to fathom. OK many non-autistic students struggle with this, but it is particularly cruel for those with autism.

You cannot just spout knowledge - lots of information, or miraculously quick thinking out and getting answers, or a lot of aptitudes that autistic spectrum students may bring to university. I have astounding recall. I can reproduce tables and diagrams from memory in exams. I did great in first year then started to get into difficulties because I didn't latch on to the fact I needed to demonstrate procedures and rules of thought. It took me a long time to master this. Many students on the spectrum are completely thrown by this - they see it as unnecessary or illogical. If they keep resisting they quickly get into trouble. A common reason for university drop outs with autism is not being able to complete assignments. They just do what they think is getting the answer, and ignore what they are expected to do.

Related to this a lot of students fall down picking the wrong degree. An aptitude for numbers is not enough to do mathematics, especially pure maths, which is so abstract and theoretical that it seems to be bad for people with autism. Just because someone is really good at computer games doesn't make them obvious candidates for a computing degree. You have to do all kinds of aspects of computing to complete a course, and computing is notorious for the number of autism failures. I wish I could convince parents to be especially wary of these two subjects.

University teaching is increasingly about challenge. The old style long tedious lecture, with some old duffer droning on, has gone out of fashion. Lecturers are supposed to challenge, confront, baffle and inspire students, and increasingly they try to do this through discussion groups and group projects where the students work through problem solving exercises to learn the concepts hands on. Group work equals hazardous for autistic spectrum students. But even lecturers who talk through the material can be much more aggressive and provocative - that can be hard on students on the spectrum.

I repeatedly express concern here - though I doubt NAS decision makers are listening/reading my missives, that there is insufficient understanding of the university teaching environment and the effect it can have on students on the spectrum. Some thrive on it, others hit the wall in second year if not third year.

Therefore I think it is worth trying to find out, from talking to your son, what it was that caused him to drop out.  It might help. I think a lot of students who drop out don't understand why they seemed to fail, and it hurts them badly