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20yr old m son with aspergers... i cant cope!

beentheredonethat
over 8 years ago

Well i never thought i would be writing on the community pages of NAS...Maybe its one of those last resort things where you think.. its only typing things on a page.. no one really reads it or cares but its sometimes helpful to get it all out.. Hmm not sure...

My son was diagnosed when he was about 10 after years of SEN intervention.. school action then school action plus... got excluded within a week of senior school.. had to home teach him for a year whilst working nights as a nurse whilst waiting for a statement... New school... FABULOUS.. school was great.. they loved him... he did well.. Obviously we had the usual troubles but we dealt with them... Nightmare stages through exams.. did those.. did well.. did A levels.. did well... Went to University AND IT ALL FELL TO PIECES.... since then my son has lived in his room.. doesnt talk..  wont take medication prescribed for depression.. drinks...gets up when we go to bed and goes to bed before we get up.. lives on his computer... does not bath.. wash.. change his clothes or have his hair cut... HES 20 years old... what can i do? GP and others wont talk to me as he is a adult.. Im sure he thinks that if he is not around when we are then hes not a niance or trouble... he cant see that hes ripping me apart.. he barrs his door on his bedroom so i cant get in.. Im really at a loose end..Suggestions on a postcard? 

Parents
  • over 8 years ago

    Firstly, you are NOT a bad mum - it sounds like you haven't the support that you all need as a family. The EHCP is  new and your son will be eligible so I would contact IPSEA (NAS will have the no.)as they are up to date on what your son is entltled to and very good as they are volunteer parents going through the same as us - give them a try.

    Dis- connecting the internet won't help at the moment because it is your son's life-line. Our daughter didn't like counselling so we stopped it after two sessions - it is hard to talk when you don't know how to express yourself. Could your son write down a few words to express to you how he is feeling? 

    Please don't feel alone - it will take time to turn things around, but you will!

    Also, contact the C.A.B. to see what help you can get your son with regard to benefits and also for you as carers.Take small steps otherwise things just seem to big....x

Reply
  • over 8 years ago

    Firstly, you are NOT a bad mum - it sounds like you haven't the support that you all need as a family. The EHCP is  new and your son will be eligible so I would contact IPSEA (NAS will have the no.)as they are up to date on what your son is entltled to and very good as they are volunteer parents going through the same as us - give them a try.

    Dis- connecting the internet won't help at the moment because it is your son's life-line. Our daughter didn't like counselling so we stopped it after two sessions - it is hard to talk when you don't know how to express yourself. Could your son write down a few words to express to you how he is feeling? 

    Please don't feel alone - it will take time to turn things around, but you will!

    Also, contact the C.A.B. to see what help you can get your son with regard to benefits and also for you as carers.Take small steps otherwise things just seem to big....x

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