Recently Diagnosed and Unmasking… Hi!

Hi, 

During another difficult period in my very colourful life I sought out the local mental health team as I was diagnosed with depression at 14 and bipolar disorder at 19. In and out of mental health hospitals most of my life, I didn’t really think it fit me but I lived with it. I thought maybe I just needed a medication adjustment. 

They removed my bipolar and mental health diagnoses and referred me for an autism assessment. I had this and was diagnosed as autistic aged 41. Meanwhile, I am slowly coming off the medication I don’t need and have been on for 26 years. Heavy stuff over the years. It was a shock. I hadn’t considered autism. My 35 year old little brother was the autistic one, diagnosed at 5. I was the crazy, kooky but sensible one.

I worked during covid and I got PTSD from the things I saw and did, I had EMDR and it was good. I still live with some symptoms. I think my PTSD led to my unmasking and breakdown at work where for the first time I was described as unmanageable and fickle.

I am still off work and waiting for some support as I’m desperate to get back in a redeployed role with some adjustments. I am a registered nurse with experience of prison, police custody and after covid I was a nurse lecturer in anatomy and physiology and clinical skills. It was suggested that academic research and non patient facing roles would be better. I’ve found the tiktok community quite helpful.

I have special interests in the human body, academia, diagnostics, geisha culture, science, astronomy and space. I am a music buff and I love history, etymology and anthropology. I am also interested in true crime, criminal justice, cults and high demand religion. I am obsessed about comedy and a lot of my phrases are from these programs. I think people would say I’m funny. 

I notice everything and I struggle with sensory processing and coping with everyday life. I find friends a drain and prefer to keep people at a distance, I always have. I have a strong sense of justice and can be very blunt. I am a kind and good person though. I am very accepting and I hate injustice and unkind people. I like to think critically. I don’t love and I’m not interested in relationships, I have no children. I am bisexual and alternative.

Anyway, that’s me! Hi! I’m quite isolated as I’m unmasking an I get embarrassed about it. I have a sunflower lanyard and an access card but feel weird about using it. 

Well done if you read this far! 
I LOVE Bluey and fidget toys!
Blip!