Me

Autism wasn’t a word I’d heard in 1965,  
But I knew that I was different, and seemed out of my time 
Others must have spotted, this strangeness that was me 
So spread the word, and changed the way, that they all treated me. 
Some ignored and distanced me, and wouldn’t let me play 
Others beat or bullied me, or took my things away 
As teenage years got harder, and the violence took its toll 
I often thought that it’ll be over soon, I doubt that I’ll get old. 
 
My family were just as bad, they seemed to be dismayed 
That one of theirs was different in the way that he behaved 
Instead of love and protection, and having my back covered 
They beat me and chastised me, just like all the others! 
My father must have been so glad that the problem that was me 
Was a problem caused by another man, not his decendancy 
So justified in his feelings, for this reject in his line 
He carried on the hatred , but never spotted mine! 
 
I was always a very loving soul, and showed it in my deeds 
Running errands, doing chores and making cups of tea 
I would have been there for him, if he had loved me well 
Instead, he was alone in a nursing home, as he was called to Hell. 
Teenage years and twenties, had made me somewhat stronger 
I was hard to bully, but still hard to like, why, I began to wonder! 
I struggled to see, why what was in me, others seemed to hate 
So I settled myself to thinking, that this was just my fate. 
 
Two marriages and two children, tempered my anger and pain 
And through the years, I found some calm, and learned to love again 
I didnt always get it right, I stumbled and I fell 
But with love, support and laughter, I broke the evil spell. 
I still seem strange to many, some, still have their thoughts 
But I find that I can deal with it, knowing it’s not my fault 
That I am one of a very large group, just like someone with a stutter 
Hi,  did you know I’m autistic, not a bloody nutter!