I finally got my diagnosis...

I am 31 years old and I have just been diagnosed with autism.  (Just as a side note, I generally prefer to refer to myself as an autistic person, not as "having" or being diagnosed with).  

I just wanted to share that with someone and say it "out loud". 

It's been really emotional which I wasn't expecting, I cried loads and loads when I got told and I'm still not sure why.  I think having someone finally listen to me and say, yes, we agree, you have autism and we acknowledge how badly you have been struggling with your mental health as a result, made me emotional. Did anyone else feel this way?  Overwhelmed because you didn't just get the door slammed in your face, but vindicated in a way?   I guess part of me did grieve for the simple fact that I was diagnosed aged 31 and I do feel some resentment over that still.  I often wonder what my life would have been like if I had been diagnosed 5, 10, 15 years ago, or diagnosed when I was a child when the signs were clearly there. 

Of course I'm resisting the urge to go around every healthcare professional who dismissed me or doubted me and go SEEEEEEEE I TOLD YOU in their faces. 

Also had a few people giving me the......"well you can't be THAT autistic then", or the good old..."I've known you your entire life and you've never been autistic before" xD  It's getting easier to manage this and not feel like such an imposter now that I've had my diagnosed confirmed. 

I've posted on these forums a few times before, right back at the beginning when I was sure I was autistic but I was lost and confused and didn't know what to do about that. People in this community gave me the confidence and strength to go back to my GP and stand up for what I felt I needed.  I was given good advice on how to approach it with my GP and more importantly, I was never made to feel silly or stupid and my concerns or thoughts were never shunned or ignored.  I want to thank the autistic community for their support - being able to access and being part of a neurodiverse community is the best thing that has ever happened to me and my mental health.  People don't realise how important platforms like this are to autistic people and I just wanted to express how grateful I am  to be part of a community that fosters an inclusive and non-judgemental space. 

Thank you for listening to my ramblings and comment with your experiences or thoughts if you'd like to - it makes me feel a lot less alone <3