Hi.
I'm feeling worried about the future. I have autism, ADHD, depression and anxiety. I spend nearly all my time feeling on edge and anxious.
Currently I'm living with my parents but they are getting on in years and that are starting to struggle with looking after me. I've tried working in the past but it was disastrous each time and I ended up sectioned. I've since been signed off from work.
I never used to struggle but a few years ago my mum was in hospital with blood problems and my dad has diabetes and was in hospital and since then I can't get it out of my head and am always aware they might get ill again.
The thought of ending up in an autism home scares me but it's better than a mental health hospital. I have struggled mentally when under extreme stress but I wouldn't want to be hospitalised permanently.
I looked up autism homes but I don't think I could afford to do that. So now I'm feeling anxious because I don't know what I'll do in the future after my parents are gone.
Growing up I had amazing plans for my life. I wanted to find a lovely man I would marry, have children, learn to drive, get a good job... But none of it ever happened. I've never come close to any of this.
I'm not sure what will happen in the future. I'm only 27 but I feel like my life is already over in a way, it's a weird feeling because I'm not suicidal and I really enjoy my life but I'm plagued by worrying and fear.
Mostly aside from the excessive worrying I enjoy my life. I like to play with toys, listen to music, watch films... I'm passionate about singing.
I've tried accessing professional support but it's never been any help. If anything I would say it's made me worse. I'm hoping being a part of this community will help me more.