Published on 12, July, 2020
Im not officially diagnosed with autism, but I am mostly sure that i am autistic or at least neurodivergent in some way. I have always felt like there was something wrong with me, even when i was young I realised that there was something different about me, the way I thought, behaved and communicated was different than other kids. As i grew up, i just thought i must be doing something wrong, so i just tried to pretend to be more normal by copying people around me.
A few years ago, i was looking up something about autism, i don’t remember why, and I realised that autism is actually a lot different than what I thought and saw before on tv or media. And I also realised that i fit into most of traits and it explained a lot about my life and how I felt. I didn’t tell anyone about this, but I kept thinking about it ever since.
Around 3 years ago my younger brother got diagnosed with autism, so my mom started to learn more about it to be able to help and understand him better. And she told me about how she thought that i actually have shown a lot of signs since my early childhood.
At first i ignored it and thought i was just overthinking, but then i kept seeing things about autistic people and their experiences and i keep thinking about how much i relate. I also did a lot of research into the subject and even tried multiple online tests, so im mostly sure i have autism. But since i am still undiagnosed, it feels a bit wrong to actually call myself autistic or tell anyone. Can i still say i am autistic even if i dont have an official diagnosis? Would that be morally wrong or offensive to diagnosed autistic people? Sorry if i said anything rude or wrote too much.
It may help to take some of the tests available online.
also here's a good video to help you.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJdy5K1DYYA&ab_channel=AutismFromTheInside
Thanks, i will check out that video.
I already tried a few tests that i found online, and I looked at some videos about the official test. Do you know any specific online test that i could take?
Hi. I hope Uhane will have some more recommendations of tests for you, but in the meantime The Monotropism Questionnaire might be a useful test to take.
The Monotropism Questionnaire is not an autism test as such but it will show you if you have a monotropic cognitive style which is very common among autistic people:
https://dlcincluded.github.io/MQ/
Monotropism describes the autistic led theory that our community usually has a single attention tunnel which is usually based around a few or a singular interest at a time. Basically monotropism describes a single attention tunnel and interest based nervous system.
If you want to learn more about monotropism, here is the website:
https://monotropism.org/
I hope this helps!
That’s great Purple Lily! I am glad the Monotropism questionnaire has helped you understand your autistic neurology in more depth! Enjoy your Monotropism deep dive, how very monotropic of you!?
A few months, I posted this questionnaire in this community and there were lots of results from different members including myself.
Here is the link to the discussion:
https://community.autism.org.uk/f/adults-on-the-autistic-spectrum/32944/monotropism-questionnaire/330271#330271
I just finished he questionnaire, and honestly i was extremely surprised by the results. I really didn’t expect to relate to the traits of Monotropism so much. Tbh, i though that this was just a common way of thinking, or at least for people with more anxiety. The results said that apparently im more Monotropic than about 25% of autistic people and about 90% of allistic people. Now im even more interested in topic and i think its worth looking into a bit more.
Great! Glad you found it interesting! I hope the theory of monotropism resonates with you.
I am very monotropic!