Hi, newly diagnosed...

Hi OceanWaves

I was also diagnosed recently after suspecting being autistic for the past 2 years, so I'm still trying to "find my feet".

Some days are good / positive and others not so.
I have done a lot of reflection over the past weeks, and do wonder how things would maybe have been different if I wasn't autistic or had a much earlier diagnosis.
The way that I try to look at it is that all of that is in the past and cannot be changed - we can only MOVE FORWARD.

TBH, I don't think that I have had a terribly bad life, in fact quite to the contrary.
I have a very loving wife (without who I probably wouldn't be alive)
We have 2 fantastic children, well actually young adults who are both doing really well.
We have the most beautiful granddaughter and another one on the way.
We have a nice comfortable home of which we own ~95% (chipping away at the mortgage....not long now) 
I/we have a very small number of friends....people who we can rely on day in, day out.

Back on topic (apologies), obviously the diagnosis DOES change things.
I'm still me and you are still you.
However, we now have validation and should embrace all that that gives to us.
For me, to pick one of the [hopefully] many positives is that I now have protection in the workplace - something that had been concerning me pre-diagnosis.

I wish you well with your diagnosis and am more than happy to chat openly on the forum or via PM. 

Hi ocean waves.  It took 18-24 months for me to settle into the new found knowledge. I remember here someone said "it's like getting the manual for your life and opening it up to find the pages are blank". It's hard if you have masked for so long to know what is really you under all the layers. However, it's had a huge impact on my life in a positive way in that now I know what I'm working with. I don't have to live up to my own expectations of what I perceived everyone else to be. So I can be a bit kinder to myself and to others (instead of getting frustrated). It's not really a negative but accepting that I DO need informal help for certain aspects of my life and will likely do so ongoing (in terms of difficulty communicating in some situations and also some executive function difficulties) which is perfectly fine because the world isn't set up well for autistic people. Welcome!

I realised that I was autistic at 59 years of age, and was subsequently diagnosed. The impact of this has been overwhelmingly positive. Having a reason for my traits, problems and limitations has been liberating. Finding that there were other people like me is a huge comfort. I felt so much joy when I found out that other people cut out all the - frankly torturing - labels from their clothes.

I was put on mirtazapine, because it’s also supposed to be good for regulating sleep, but so far the main effect I’ve noticed is weight gain - about 8kg so far. I think it’s time I stopped taking them.

Ha, I was torn between sertraline and certalapran as most people either on one or the other that I know. You get yourself up to the max dose of one, it's stops having any effect it may have had, so the start you the other one. I climbed my way up to the max dosage on that, so now I'm of off that, and back were I started in the first place, approx 10 years ago.. 

My son has recently been diagnosed asd, and I can see it clear as daylight in my young grandchildren, which I have raised my concerns about. With a watchful eye, I shall be making sure they're not put on that treadmill and spend a lifetime masking. 

So being new here, do we share tips on things like...how to make a coffee without boiling the kettle ten times ?

I identify with that so much. I wish I’d known when I was young enough for it to make a difference.

I'm fifty three. I was diagnosed last year. It made sense, as I've always been different. As time has gone on, it has lead to me fully understanding myself, and accepting some aspects that I had denied, like my need for cross dressing. I'm a big biker, most of the time. I have found the whole process like pealing an onion, whilst kicking a hornet's nest.

I was unaware of sertaline until now, my only experience is taking citalopram. I was unaware of sertaline until now, my only experience is taking citalopram. I'm 50 and was diagnosed when I was 48. I was on the treadmill (frantically, like a hamster and felt trapped in it) for 15 years i.e. employed and have spent the last 15 years more off it (although I'm very good at creating+finding my own treadmills sadly including for example having been a fanatical type runner) i.e. unemployed . It's a minefield imo.

I was unaware of sertaline until now, my only experience is taking citalopram. My experience is similar to yours, I'm 50 and was diagnosed when I was 48.

Hello, I am new here also

I am 54 and was diagnosed aged 49, also adhd. As much as I know, realise and understand I am autistic, the imposter in me still tells myself I'm not if that makes sense. I wish I could offer you words of wisdom on how it gets better with age, unfortunately the older you get the more draining I find it all. I look back on how I feel my whole life the times when I should have been understood and helped, I was punished. From teachers, from one boss to the next angry with me for things that I'd struggle with, a lifetime of floor level self esteem. Another challenge I find is people who are ignorant in general, but more so when they absolutely no clue about autism, and this can mean people working within the health profession. There is a support group here in my city, it was invaluable to me in learning and understanding my conditions, other than that though, you are literally told you have it, and that's it get on with it. Here in sertraline city as everyone rushing through life, im looking out and realising that I feel like I've spent my life on a treadmill that I didn't want to be on. I've spent my life going above and beyond trying to cover up or make up for all the mistakes. It's a hard habit to break now, but I am determined to stop masking and not get embarrassed about me just being me. It probably doesn't sound like it in this message but I do try to find humour in most things, that helps. 

I'm similar and was diagnosed in November 2021 aged 48.

Hello OceanWaves, and welcome.

Like you, the realisation that I am autistic was a bit of a surprise and a great relief, at last I had some answers. My story spans decades of difficulties and is just too lengthy to put in a forum post; however, since coming here I have met a whole bunch of folk with similar back-stories; indeed, it sometimes feels like an epidemic. 

My diagnosis, or enlightenment, came three years ago at the age of 67... but oh how I wish I'd known earlier.

Ben

Hi, and welcome!

I was diagnosed this year at the age of 52, and my first reaction was grief for the younger me and the life I might have had if I’d received help and support.

Now I have mixed feelings. I’m still remembering things that happened in the past and understanding and reinterpreting them through the lens of autism.

There’s some relief from knowing I’m not just a rubbish person, but also sadness that my life is unlikely to get better.

Realising that i am autistic has come with relief. I now understand my self better and dont try so hard to be like everyone else.