Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello folks!
My brother is 41 and has just been diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome. Since the age of 3 he has had behavioural problems. This has taken its toll on my Dad, Mum and me his sister. I had a nervous breakdown 20 years ago due to his behaviour and still bear the scars. On June 4th of this year my beloved father, a retired doctor, hurriedly packed a few suitcases and fled, with my Mum and our Labrador, to Scotland from England. I was with my fiancé in Glasgow when I got a desperate call from my father to say that they were at a motorway service station, fleeing for their lives from my brother. They took refuge with us. We provided a "safe house" for my dear parents. My Dad feared that my "aspie" brother would pour petrol through the letter box and they would be burned alive in their beds. He spoke to us about how best he and my Mum could protect themselves.
There is an army of psychiatrists, psychologists, social workers, RMNs, support workers and the list goes on ad infinitum of people who are devoted to caring for people like my brother. Who is looking out for us? Are we not the real victims of Aspergers? The police will only step in if we are assaulted. So we wait in our homes...to be attacked...murdered...annihilated...we don't know what awaits us but we wait.
i would be very interested to hear what this community thinks about our predicament. How do those with Aspergers feel when they read of our heartbreak? How do the professionals feel? What advice can they give us?
A final question...if there are any security experts reading this can they give us any tips on how to keep ourselves safe. I know I will never feel safe in this world while my brother is alive.
Kindest regards,
Anguished Sibling.
Hi - I feel sorry for everyone mentioned in your post - awful for you all. Let down presumably by all those services supposed to help you. I presume you've been trying for many yrs to get help for your brother without success. I'm a parent of an autistic young man who is autistic but not aspergers. Sometimes, once someone has been diagnosed with a condition, that condition is identified as the cause of a behaviour. Sometimes that's right, sometimes it's wrong. Everyone with a diagnosis of autism is still an individual, with their own personality etc. It must have been difficult for decades for your brother + your whole family. I don't down-play that at all. Then there's the diagnosis in his early 40s. You've all had more than enough to cope with. I don't know what's made your brother behave in such a way that your parents had to flee. There's decades of history behind that. I won't try to rationalise or take sides because I don't know the details. But : I do feel for all of you + the situation you're in.