Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all, just interested in finding out how you became aware of your Autism?
for me, it was very recently at the age of 53, i had been sat doing a bit of soul searching, sat there looking back through my life realising i havent had as many relationships as others my age, and realising i only have family and work colleague, not friends and that i have struggle throughout life to try to form any.
i find starting up conversations can be very difficult, and keeping them going more so, i have never felt comfortable in social settings, often trying to find a corner to slink off in to. Centre of attention is a big no, i had to give a best mans speech once, i didnt sleep well for 3 weeks, and on the big day had to have plenty of support from the wife and dutch courage from the bottle.
I thought i may have just been very insecure and shy but decided, although its too late in life to change whats past, i would have a chat with my GP, just to see if there was anything that could explain "me".
having completed the test she sent, it came back with the result of strong Autistic characteristics. i now have to wait to get a proper assessment, but this could help explain why i am the way i am
Siggy
I had that best man speech nightmare come up for me as well. It was months of near-constant dread and I had to get Valium from the GP before it which in the end barely took the edge off. I gave an awful speech and nobody is less suited to being a stand up comedian or the centre of attention than I am. I remember the last of my remaining hair on top falling out rapidly in the weeks beforehand. That didn’t help either! I obsessively researched what a BM speech was supposed to be like. On YouTube you can watch examples. I’d look at one that seemed good to me, but the comments underneath would be tho gs like ‘you ruined this couples big day, well done idiot’ and stuff. So the horror was just intensified. My brother meant well on asking me (and obviously one feels that declining is not an option) but I think he understands better now what that would have been like for me. I survived it but it was extremely stressful