I've been struggling with stress and anxiety for some time but it's only the last 3 or 4 years I've realised what is happening to me is anxiety. About two years ago I've read a fiction book which had an asperger character in it. That was a big revelation for me.Since then I've been researching autism and I suspect I'm on the sprectrum too. I've been waiting for a diagnosis for about 20 months. It's a very weird situation as to the outside world I am normal but I feel that I'm different in many ways. I've told a few people in my family and a couple of my friends know but at first they all shake their heads in doubt. They can't beleive it. Except my husband, who has been very supportive. I think he understands me as he is quite similar to me. And he has to listen to me complaining all the time. Poor him!
I hope to find someone here in a similar situation so that I can discuss my feelings. I'm in my forties, married, have two children. I have a job too. So to the outside world I'm a successful woman.
But I feel tense all the time. Many things annoy me: mess, noise, sjoring, light, smell, shouting and arguing just to name a few. Have meltdowns about tiny details. I get bored and stressed in social situations. I love order, tidy spaces, books, swimming and walks in the countryside.
I take everyting word for word, this causes tension at my workplace, for me especially, the others find it funny. Most of the time I know when they joke but even though I know it, the way I reply suggests I took the comment literally.
I've put this down for many years for the fact that I'm a foreigner, I came to the UK in my mid twenties. But I'm beginning to realise that this belief was helping me to mask my weirdness.
Anyway, thank you for reading my introduction which is rather long, sorry, but I find it hard to get to the point and summarize the main things.
