Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello all! I’ve found myself in this corner of the internet because at almost 30 I think the pieces are finally coming together to make the right picture.
My sister has been telling me for years ( she works in mental health) and my partner have been telling me for the last year that maybe my mental health issues are symptomatic of something else and I’ve come to realise through a lot of research that it is probably autism. I’ve been reading and listening to podcasts and it’s gotten me quite distressed at times - hearing descriptions of situations and feelings I’ve had before and never made a connected to possibly being neuro divergent
I’m very introverted and often shut down entirely in social situations and lately I moved to a new place and have tried to start new studies and it just all has become super overwhelming. I had big struggles with this at 18 when I moved out for uni but I feel like I’m reliving a lot of that again now, except maybe now I know the reason why it’s feeling so much harder than it seems to be for my other classmates. Anyway I was glad to find this, it seems a great source of info and I’m going to be speaking to my GP about getting a diagnosis and some support for my anxiety. I’m happy to be here at this point and I’d be grateful of input on how I can start to process this situation
Hi Catlady,
Great name: I'm a big ailurophile myself.
I'm fairly new to the forum too and have found it helpful and also reassuring (realising there is a whole community of people that have faced similar things to myself).
As for processing, I would say take your time. I'm still very much in the early stages of that myself and to be honest it has been quite intense. Having to reconfigure your understanding of yourself is hard work and very emotional. However, I am the same person I was before I suspected I was on the spectrum and so I am determined to see it as a positive thing that can only serve to improve my life.
Hi. Sounds like you are already processing things, and taking the journey towards diagnosis will help. Write down the situations and feelings you had in the past that you feel are because of being autistic - will help when going to the GP, and later in the diagnosis process. If you family and partner can write down anything they are aware of that will also help.
Being introverted, or withdrawn perhaps, is classic autism and difficulties with social situations also - social anxiety is likely, but also selective mutism to think about, and social interaction difficulties (picking up social cues, knowing when to speak). Autistic people tend not to manage thoughts and feelings well, leading to anxiety and also depression. Be aware of your thoughts - if you worry a lot, have troubling thoughts or flashbacks, are negative about yourself, or confused about things, then these can cause anxiety, and depression. Worth thinking about any sensory issues or triggers you may have.
You seem to be quite accepting of your potential autism so that is good, and will help going forward.
It can be a case of slowly waking up to our autism, even after diagnosis, so just go with the flow, but talking/sharing here or with partner/family is really important, especially the really difficult things.
Hi Catlady and welcome to the community! Glad that you have already found some useful information on the website, if you ever have any questions or advice that you cannot find info on definitly post here as the community are truley awesome and will help where they can.
All the best,
Sarah