Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi My 14 Yr old son has just received his autism diagnosis which he isn't taking to well, he's really struggling with school he's high functioning so the academic side is fine it's the social aspect that he's struggling with, he refuses to go numerous times a week which is really affecting his grades ,he also suffers from severe paranoia so he won't accept any help from anyone he has severe trust issues he's angry most of the time the teachers have tried to lighten his load but he's refusing any help he takes all of his anger out on me and calls me terrible names has anyone else experienced this kind of behaviour does anyone have any advice as I'm at my witts end .
Hi,
Like you our daughter has recently been diagnosed and is struggling with the diagnosis. It’s been a long 3 years for us to get to this point (she is now 16 and weeks away from GCSEs and hasn’t attended school for most of her final year, high functioning but we have given up 2 GCSEs to take the pressure off). She will not talk to us about anything and clams up and walks away if we try to broach anything outside of her comfort zone. The most important thing we have done is find her someone to speak to, she had 2 years of general counselling followed by almost a year of CBT and has now started DBT which really resonates with how she is feeling. Accepting she won’t turn to me, her mum, has been hard but our relationship is better when I accept it is easier for her to tell a stranger her thoughts and worries. It might take a while to find the right person but counselling directories give profiles with pictures and we phoned lots to see if they sounded and looked like someone our daughter would take to!
Socially, we have also had to accept that for now communicating with friends via text/social media will have to do. The odd, one hour lunch with her best friend is the most she can cope with.
I hope some of the above is of help or at least comfort in knowing you are not alone in tearing your hair out!!!
Hello NAS79422,
I'm sorry to hear that your son has been struggling. Individuals on the spectrum can often display behaviour that may be challenging. There will generally be a reason for this and it is important to try and understand the trigger for the behaviour when developing strategies. You may like to have a look at the following link for more information on behaviour and strategies:
https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/behaviour
You may be interested in seeking some professional support regarding the behaviour. You can search for professionals in your area we are aware of on the Autism Services Directory:
https://www.autism.org.uk/directory
You might also like to take a look at The Challenging Behaviour Foundation website for further information and advice:
https://www.challengingbehaviour.org.uk. They also have an information and support service which you can contact by phone or email – details can be found here: https://www.challengingbehaviour.org.uk/for-family-carers/family-support-service/
All the best,
ChloeMod