Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello,
I'm new to this community and just recently joined NAS as a member after thinking about doing so for the last few months.
I am a woman in my late 20s and was diagnosed with autism in my early 20s. I was only referred for a diagnosis after I had developed an eating disorder, anorexia, which greatly impacted my ability to work and live normally.
During childhood I had been referred to many counsellors and therapist's because of a delay in development, selective mutism and my difficulties in making or maintaining friendships. I believe the lack of help in childhood did lead into the 5/6 years I struggled with an ED. It has only been very recently that I managed to get into work and lead a somewhat regular life, though I find myself struggling again (I currently work as a carer/support worker but I feel like that was an awful decision so I've had to quit and look for work elsewhere).
Finding work that suits me has been a challenge and I'm still looking. With the current increase in cost of living it has left me feeling really stressed. I am sure I am not the only person who feels this way.
I hope to gather advice and hopefully provide some advice whilst in this community. From what I have seen there are many discussions on topics that affect me, so I am glad that there is advice and guidance put there.
My son has Selective Mutism too - it’s such a difficult thing to cope with. I think finding a job that is tolerable is very often difficult for autistic people. My eldest has struggled with this even though they did incredibly well in education - because so many workplaces have a lot of aspects that relate to social skills etc. I hope you find something that suits you better soon. The financial side of things is so stressful - especially at the moment. Good luck :)
Yes, selective mutisum made many things almost impossible for me. It still happens now but I have somewhat improved. I used to get what felt like a physical lump in my throat which made me unable to speak in highschool when teachers asked me questions in front of the class. Having to stand up and speak in front of so many people was terrifying to me. Even now I sometimes go silent and many people see that as me being rude when it really isn't.
I've already had an offer for another job, which I have taken. It's only three nights a week but is during a quiet time and focuses on routine tasks, most of which are cleaning. I also did really well acdemicly - I have a degree in animal science and welfare - but it is the social skill and ability to cope in certain enviroments with so many stimuli that stops me from making the most of my knowledge and skills. I won't let it get me down but sometimes it can feel like going back to square one again.
Thank you for the luck. :)
Selective Mutism is the hardest thing for my son. Lots of people don’t really understand it - which doesn’t help. My son hates to be the centre of attention and I think that’s how it started (when gphe was only 4 years old). He’s an adult now - the SM has massively impacted on his education and social skills. He’s a wonderful person and it makes me sad that most people don’t get to hear him speak as he is very intelligent and wise and has a great sense of humour, but people don’t get to see that and they underestimate him I think. I’m sorry you’ve had to deal with selective mutism too. It’s great you’ve found a job that you’re happy with. It’s not easy for autistic people to find a good ‘fit’ with employment. My eldest (who is also autistic) has really struggled to find a job he enjoys (or Dan even bear) despite having done really well at Uni. Hope things go well at your new job :)