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Diagnosis refusal

NAS72612
over 3 years ago

Hi Each, I could really do with some wise words right now. After repeatedly asking CAMHS to assess my now 15yr old son over a period of 7 yrs. We finally got the diagnosis that I knew was inevitable.. The problem is is that my son is declining to accept the diagnosis after being told by one of the assessors that he could choose not to accept a formal diagnosis. Whilst I fully understand that he is entitled to make this decision I am absolutely gutted by this. He's due to start college in September and is going to need a lot of support to make the transition. It would be so much easier to be able to say that his challenges come from Autism not bad behaviour which was how he was treated at school. I cannot bear the thought of having to endlessly advocate for him whilst withholding the single piece of information that would unlock the help he so desperately needs because he is anxious nearly all of the time. I know I have to respect his decision but i feel so let down that after all the worrying and fighting for his rights we finally have an answer but cannot use it. I know that I'm probably being selfish and am so deflated by this turn of events. We waited 2 years to even get the assessments done. Any wise words would be gratefully recieved

Parents
  • over 3 years ago
    NAS72612 said:
    15yr old son

    Children are not my area of expertise, but surely he's still a minor until he's 18?

    So, if he wants to go to college and continue to benefit from living at home rent-free and with all the benefits that brings, then he has to uphold his part of the family contract and accept the diagnosis in order to access the correct support. Make the choice clear for him: if he chooses not to accept a formal diagnosis, and not accepting a formal diagnosis prevents him from accessing the appropriate level of support when he starts college, then he must face the consequences—and he will not be able to rely upon you to replace the support or advocate for him when things go wrong.

Reply
  • over 3 years ago
    NAS72612 said:
    15yr old son

    Children are not my area of expertise, but surely he's still a minor until he's 18?

    So, if he wants to go to college and continue to benefit from living at home rent-free and with all the benefits that brings, then he has to uphold his part of the family contract and accept the diagnosis in order to access the correct support. Make the choice clear for him: if he chooses not to accept a formal diagnosis, and not accepting a formal diagnosis prevents him from accessing the appropriate level of support when he starts college, then he must face the consequences—and he will not be able to rely upon you to replace the support or advocate for him when things go wrong.

Children