Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi everyone, I’m completely new to this but was diagnosed with aspergers almost 2 years ago at age 25. I have struggled reaching out for help, autism was always known as a bad thing growing up and I haven’t really wanted the diagnosis to be real, but sometimes I’m not even sure if it is. As a female on the spectrum, I’ve had many difficulties but have always masked my “bad” (autistic) behaviour and hidden the real me so that I can just kinda get by in life, which is why it took so long for me to get a diagnosis. I’m on the high performing end and as such, my parents and peers tell me I’m “not that autistic” which feels really horrible considering how hard I’ve had to try all my life to seem normal. I guess I wanna know if anyone else feels this way, I still don’t really know what it means to be autistic and if I even am autistic or just a bit weird. It’s really depressing me and I can’t keep pretending to be normal for other people’s sake but they don’t believe I’m in need of help.
I got diagnosed at 30 in feb this year. I've been feeling the same way and have the same response from my parent and friends as well. I do feel like a total fraud and my family totally dismiss my Asperges as something I've made up even though they've read the report. The trying to be 'normal' I've found doesn't work as I've lost jobs and relationships as it will inevitably build up too much.
For me, i'm still the person I was before i was told, just now I can actually know myself better. I've been reading up on asperges and stealing tips and tricks others use to help in their lives. Also I've referred myself onto a peer support group in my area to help me be around 'fresh' people where I don't have to act 'normal'. I'd whole heartedly suggest you look into it.
Hope that helps in some way, by the way I'm new on here as well.