Hello

Hello, I'm Benjamin.

I feel very confused & anxious in life.

Was diagnosed with "Asperger's Syndrome/High Functioning Autism" towards the end of junior school. Never really thought of it as a problem. Always felt a little different but overall I coped. Ended up going to an out of county mainstream private school which was meant to have better understanding for pupils with autism.

I am now 20 and at University (though as a commuter). I feel confused because despite being sent to a more supportive school and ending up with ok grades, my mental health/way of thinking seems terrible. It's like I have to analyse everything in a stupid level of detail and then end up feeling really overwhelmed and end up feeling really down, usually about lack of social ability, but other things too.

I have 2 friends which I made during junior/secondary school, however I still only see them via parent organised/requested content which I feel awful about being and while I realise this is more than some, still feel awful about not having many friends or being able to talk to any peers.

Went through most of my teenage years making friends and playing on Roblox. Still do the odd bit of scripting but can't really socialise on it anymore as too old without being creepy/questionable. Have been working on a game on that as a lockdown project to stay entertained :-).

Want to know how I can go about trying to improve my social situation, but everything suggested just seems wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to anxiety inducing and can't break it down into any less worse smaller steps.

Joined these forums as I always get the perception that the NAS don't do much apart from bloat out information I already know, and want to work out how others cope and perhaps see if I just don't know enough about the NAS to have that perception, so print("Hello World!")!

  • I suggest teaching Roblox / minecraft   - I mean setting up and creating educational tutorials for the next wave of benjamins  ---  youtube video - or website - or in a Roblox forum. 

    NAS are very useful as a gathering point - they created amd maintain this forumn which is very useful for all us to connect.  Maybe volunteer as a maintainance guy ---- send them an  email. I dont know if u are working. If not i suggest getting into IT. 

    Basically u need something to occupy your entire mind so that whn you are doing it you stop thinking about stuff. This helps to reduce anxiety. The simplest way is to do a regular 30min walk. ( walk dogs for money ? dogs are very good for anxiety) 

      plays an instrument this is another way to take over your mind ( it is a type of "meditation by doing" )

    I do meditation which works for me ( ask questions if interested )

    i am high functioning which to me, at times is real mental torture to be honest.  I tend to work like f*ck sometimes because if I stop I worry about sh*te and it is Sh*te when u write it down on a piece of paper!    I suffer from delusional thinkin but NTs also suffer from this :)

  • Hi Benjamin 

    I cope by playing guitar and creating my own compositions ,

    Also learning to think  a lot slower than i have 

    Nas website is a very helpful site and wish it was around in the 80's when i was 20 ,