Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello, I'm new and struggling so wanted to post, wondering if anyone might be able to say something that helps shift my thinking and how I feel.
I have a gorgeous little nephew with ASD, undiagnosed at present but after having worked with children alot and having my own, I can see that a diagnosis is just a matter of time; I can also see that mainstream school will never be a good match for him. That we have no idea how much level of care and what help he will need into adulthood yet.
My brother has announced they are expecting a second and I feel pretty angry about this; I feel they have no idea what their first borns needs will be yet, but I can see it is going to be anything but easy, fighting for help and services and dealing with his frustrations. It feels selfish and reckless, not an adult decision. They recieved no genetic counselling, just jumped straight in.
I know I need to respect my brothers choices here but I am worried this second born, which is a boy, will be more severley affected. I also feel concerned because the mother has a severe mental health problem.
I love spending time with my nephew and he gives us all a lot of joy, but it is really hard work for very little if anything back in the way of interaction, I am worried he will always struggle to make friends, at the moment this is completely unimportant to him.
I also feel they have no real idea of the increased level of support they are going to need from a family of 3 to a 4 and as he grows, like they haven't considered this at all.
Sorry in advance if my email offends anyone, as this is not my intention, I'd really just like to feel better about this and thought this may a good place for me to work through it. Ive been sitting on this for a while now and I don't like feeling this way. Thanks
I'm looking at your posts hoping that your sense of of arrogance with subdue over time.
You obviously presume you know everything and as usual with domineering personalities who hide behind good intentions you will cause more harm with your interfering ways.
I suggest you go and look in the mirror before you start picking your family apart.
How would your family feel if they knew your lowly opinion of them. Stop playing Mother Teresa and deal with your own issues before you do any more harm .
Of course you're saying everything with the best intentions...?
Interesting opinions and false assumptions you've made, but totally unhelpful, sorry you felt the need to spend your time writing this as what you say is not valid for this discussion. Please don't take your frustrations out in a personal attack on me or anyone else for that matter; can I suggest you read the forum guidance, this forum has been set up to offer support. If you want to bridge the gap then discussion, sharing and edcuation is the way to go. Thanks.