Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi all, long story short I've been on the waiting list for ASD evaluation for 12 months and hoping for a positive result in Spring, did an awful lot of blogging and connecting with others via social media last year and feel so much in common with most others on the spectrum, but then realised that social media is a real source of stress for me and withdrew completely from all platforms in Autumn last year.
I miss the connections I made, but can't risk going back as I'm pretty sure I'll end up consumed by it and stressed again. Hopefully I can make some good friends here. I tried Wrong Planet but chose a non-anonymous username that I couldn't then get rid of, and think that remaining anonymous here might allow me to discuss more freely.
I'm middle-aged, and male.
The impact of ASD on me is (as far as I know):
For the last 20 or so years leading up to autumn 2017 I had been unknowingly masking all of this using intellectual effort, but then the elastic snapped and I suffered what I'm describing as a mental burnout equivalent to breaking both arms and both legs. Now I'm carefully rebuilding myself in the light of all of this new knowledge, knowing that I need to try extra hard to monitor my stress level (see above re interoception and alexithymia) and also knowing that what I thought was a comfortable 5/10 was closer to 95/100 and there are zones below where the happy people live.
That's probably enough for now! I genuinely do care about other people too :-).
As a rough guess - do you get lost easily? Not know fully what you are doing if the journey changes (roadworks, cancelled trains, etc), not recognise familiar surroundings?
Interesting question - I *would* have said no years ago, but I do know that it takes many attempts at driving myself somewhere before the journey becomes second nature, even with Sat Nav, and I *have* to be driving; being taken somewhere doesn't help me find it on my own. I can also become suddenly unsure where I am (e.g. what direction I'm approaching a familiar place from) - i.e. I know 'm heading towards a familiar village for e.g., but it's not until I arrive that I realise which road I was on :-).
Same