Hello! I'm new here.

Hello Mrs Oldknow - and welcome!

I know what you mean about switching.  As soon as I got my diagnosis (in fact, well before that), I started reading everything, absorbing the information, feeling validated at last.  But sometimes I just want to shut off from it.  Very occasionally, I wish I didn't have it.  But in the main I embrace it.

I assume that your daughters, step-daughter and husband are high-functioning (I hate that term, but you know what I mean).  Was it the house-move itself that triggered the stresses?  I always find changes to environment and routine stressful.  It takes a while to settle down again.

Feel free to talk about things.  We're all here to help, support and advise if we can.  It's a friendly community.

Best wishes,

Tom

Thanks for the welcome Tom. Yes they are all high functioning (I'm not keen on the term either) and are all quite intolerant of each others quirks so it feels like I'm living in a warzone sometimes. The house move itself was stressful for lots of reasons many of which we expected but what I hadn't anticipated was the change in my husband.

I still jointly owned the last house with my ex and although my husband paid for most of the bills etc he wasn't personally responsible for anything. Here in the new house we have a mortgage together, all the bills in his name etc and I think it is stressing him even if he doesn't think it is. He has become obsessed with taking meter readings for gas and electric every day for example and keeping doors closed. He is also driving me crazy by telling me all about the instructions for the cooker every time I cook. I much prefer to figure things out as I go along.

My eldest didn't move with us but comes to stay regularly and this causes friction because he won't tolerate some of her autistic behaviours such as needing a light on to sleep and preferring the sofa to the bunk beds in the guest room.

Mrs Oldknow said:

Here in the new house we have a mortgage together, all the bills in his name etc and I think it is stressing him even if he doesn't think it is. He has become obsessed with taking meter readings for gas and electric every day for example and keeping doors closed.

I understand!  I was exactly the same when I was married - the only time I had a mortgage.  I didn't look upon it as bricks and mortar, but as this huge debt that I would have to work years to pay off.  I have a pathological fear of debt, and could never get my head around owing tens of thousands to a bank.  I felt huge relief once I got back to renting.

I can be controlling, too.  I drove my last partner to distraction with it - though she was controlling as well.  I get used to doing a certain thing a certain way and struggle if someone else comes along and does it a different way. 

Mrs Oldknow said:

Here in the new house we have a mortgage together, all the bills in his name etc and I think it is stressing him even if he doesn't think it is. He has become obsessed with taking meter readings for gas and electric every day for example and keeping doors closed.

I understand!  I was exactly the same when I was married - the only time I had a mortgage.  I didn't look upon it as bricks and mortar, but as this huge debt that I would have to work years to pay off.  I have a pathological fear of debt, and could never get my head around owing tens of thousands to a bank.  I felt huge relief once I got back to renting.

I can be controlling, too.  I drove my last partner to distraction with it - though she was controlling as well.  I get used to doing a certain thing a certain way and struggle if someone else comes along and does it a different way.