Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi, im Hayley, I'm 29 but I don't feel it. I'm not diagnosed with autism - but the more unread the more it just makes sense. I always knew there was something different about me fron other people, not special but something I couldn't out my finger on. I have always struggled through life- early years I was in the lowest sets in classas because I didn't understand what teachers were talking about. I would often go into my own little world, never cause a fuss for anyone else but just refit off somewhere. I wasn't a bad kid but was always in detention for not doing my work. I struggled in secondary school too, very muxh kept myself to myself and ended up being bullied a lot. Had strange fascinations with things and I would always play out scenarios in my head without talking to anybody. I was always really good at art and music but everything else was beyond me. After a string of unsuccessful relationships and unsuccessful career options I have gone back to college to study art, but even know I still find myself playing with pencils or sitting crosslegged looking at colours. I have befriended a group of girls 10 years younger than me and I feel comfortable because I still feel like a child.
Does this sound like it could be autism or am I way off here? Many thanks x
Hi. I'm the same age as you and have very recently been diagnosed. Like you I always felt different and went backwards and forwards as to whether it was autism or not. Eventually I was driving myself mad and decided to go for it and find out for definite. The assessor said without a doubt. My friends have always either been younger or older than me, never the same age. I find friendships difficult so I don't have many.
The way my assessor explained it to me I had to have difficulties in different areas to get a diagnosis. These areas were communication, social interaction, sensory and flexibility of thought. Have you tried doing any of the online tests like the aq test? These can not tell you for definite but they do seem to be quite a good indicator. The only way to know for sure is to get assessed.
That's good to hear that there are going adukts getting diagnosed instead of being left to drive themselves crazy. I've suffered with depression (some time very severe) since I was 14 so I think I just put it down to that and that's why I was different. Glad you've been diagnosed - has it helped you in any way? Yeah I just don't know how to go around talking to my GP about it. I feel as though they will just say I'm being silly.
As I wrote above, I believe that you have some autistic spectrum behaviors, I suggested that if you are at a place of Full time Education it is imperative to let those that will judge your efforts have a knowledge of any impediment to communicating the Knowledge you are learning.to be assessed. As I suggest they may also have a Student Welfare department , who would be expected to help you sort out any problem. If you go straight to your local GP at home he/she then has to spend their time writing a letter at least for you to take to your College Welfare Department of Admin office, you might as well start with the College. with a print out of this NAS discussion. I do not believe there is any Cure, medicine of diets specifically for ASD, cures only for follow on behaviors.if severe. It is a lifelong disability as others here profess, but coping with it may get easier as you get older. Nobody thinks your silly. Be positive.
I couldn't face going to my gp either. In the end I decided to go for a private diagnosis. It was with a company that also do nhs diagnosis in my area so the process was the same as it would have been had I gone to my go but much quicker. The assessor didn't have any doubt that I was autistic and this made me feel much better as I'd spent years going back and forth of whether I thought I was or not. I can't say that it's been a magic fix but I do feel better. I'm no longer constantly obsessing over the fact that I may or may not be as I have an official answer. The assessor spent some time talking about how I perceive myself and that some of the things I think like I'm annoying are just things other people have put on me. It has helped me feel more confident to just be me rather than constantly try to pretend to be someone I'm not. I've still got a way to go. I haven't found the confidence to tell people yet. But I definitely feel better in myself so I am glad I went ahead and did the diagnosis.