Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone,
Will try to keep this brief as a post to "break the ice" 36 year old self confessed gaming nerd feeling out of his depth most of the time. Was diagnosed a few years ago with Aspergers by an autism assessment team and then have been somewhat floating every since with little support. Directed to this website by the only mental health recovery worker I have (thank you Leanne) and we are currently looking to find more autism focused help as my local community mental health team don't work with people with autism. Live with my older sister (42) who has also been diagnosed with aspergers and struggles with a lot of sensory based problems on top of agoraphobia so it falls on me now to be the one that faces the outside world. We sadly lost my Dad suddenly 3 years ago, who we have discovered did more for us than we realised, as learning how to run a house, manage bills, answer forms and navigate how to do things the "expected" way is very overwhelming. Lost my Mam to leukaemia when I was 15 and have spent the majority of my life struggling with my mental health and an eating disorder and all the negative coping strategies that have formed around them.Don't mean to come across as negative, but thought a very brief summary of where I am would help. On the whole I do try to hold onto hope and even the smallest things that I enjoy. They are just rather fleeting these past few years.
Am hoping these forums will provide me with some perspective and advice on what to do when you have 2 people living together with aspergers that having clashing needs at times but still need to negotiate daily things like changing energy suppliers in a bid to save money.So, hello.... I guess
Hi there, it's good to meet you. Many of us are out of our depth most of the time so you are in good company here. I was glad to read that you are still manage to find enjoyment in the smallest things - however fleeting. I read somewhere that a strength of people with Asperger's is their abiiity to stay hopeful in challenging circumstances.
To be honest I would find it very difficult to live with my sister. She is NT and I am probably autistic (waiting for a diagnosis having completed the assessment process). Sharing a home with anyone often leads to tensions and when you are related it can be even harder. I can see that when your Dad was alive things would have been easier.
I'm not sure what to suggest to make things easier with your current living situation. Negotiating is not one of my strengths so I would probably want to divide up responsibility for specific tasks to avoid having to reach a joint decision. I'm sure others in this online community will have some good ideas.
Gaming is a really helpful escape from reality sometimes, do you have any other hobbies or special interests that give you enjoyment?