Published on 12, July, 2020
hi I am new to this site and I hope someone can offer me some advice I am in need of some help, my 14 year old son has autism and doesn't have empathy does not care if he upsets someone as he sees it as that's what he thinks, or that's what he sees, its saying it how it is, why is that wrong and I have tried to explain to him why it can upset people, that some people don't understand why he does it but he just says that's me the way I am, he has been in trouble at school for his inappropriate words and comments some are rude and obscene some are racist and some are words like bomb etc and the school has said that's the path to radicalism, are the school overreacting do autistic children have these unusual behaviours because I don't want my son seen as a bad person if its something that he can not help doing, I hope I don't offend anyone with this post but I need some advice not criticism like from the teachers I am not bad mother but don't know what to do about the situation
Why should anybody that is involved with knowledge of an autistic person be offended by your son's actions. I believe you will get some good advice here from people who can relate more to the age of you son being in education, and their own experiences. What young man of 14 isn't angry with today's world. Their hormones whether autistic or not, are changing rapidly, even to the extent of wanting to be grown up, and not reliant on their mothers if that is at all possible.
That said he has to be grown up enough to try and fit in. if only to please you and your family.life since he depends on you whether he knows it or not. The offending words he uses are most probably for the effect they cause. You sound caring enough for any body to realise you are not a bad mother.
I suggest you try involve your son in this website if that is possible and follow its rules. If your son is not intent on any specific future aim. I personally for no other reason than to contain his anger, try and get him involved in an Art Based Course. Well know Artists often used the anger they feel as a positive force.
With regard to his schooling ; Your school has to help him, Others will give more up to date advice. But he should be statemented, if he has this ready and it is insufficient try and get it amended as his behavior has changed.it may require more Council funding against resistance, and he is still regarded as a child.
When you have gained enough strength to stand up against his school, Get help from your locality, even citizens advice, and get help with someone to attend a meeting with his school, don't go alone if is possible not to.