Basically looking for support and advice for and on behalf of my two young adult high functioning sons (22 and 20 yrs old) .
Elder son was diagnosed 10 years ago. He rarely leaves his room, is socially isolated, lost most of his friends,dropped out of Uni and is anxious and depressed. He is awake all night and sleeps all day and doesnt eat properly. He refuses any help offered by various organisations or GP.
Younger son was, finally, (looong story!) diagnosed just two years ago.He is at least working and has a group of friends he's had since primary school but suffers from real social anxiety, depression and has real problems with comminication. He has a support worker but that is due to end in Nov.
Seems theres a lot of support for Autistic children but not a lot once they reach adulthood!
So id be really grateful for any advice and help.
Thanks very much.
Muttering Nutter said:Seems theres a lot of support for Autistic children but not a lot once they reach adulthood!
Yes, very very very true.
But I am only posting a simple link to NAS' own page about "Adult Diagnosis", here:
Maybe these shall be helpful. Maybe.
Thank you ! =0)
Um...Thanks, you are welcome, and welcome to the Forum, and have a look around, and post things and maybe others will write stuff for you... and all that ...(!)
Thank You most of all, for (replying) giving yourself a UserName! (Recent troubles here make this more useful!) There are others here who are better at "chat" than myself, and so, do have a nice time talking to them...
:-D (That is Autism for you!)
Thank you for the welcome Disallowed Cynosure! =0)
Take care x
Hello and welcome. I like the user name.
I'm not quite clear what you want advice on. No, there are very few autism-specific post-diagnostic statutory services. I can relate to your descriptions, particularly being depressed like your older son at that age.... although I'm not sure I would have refused help. Does he not accept the diagnosis? Or has he had bad experiences with professionals? Some kind of outside activity would presumably help. Is there anything he's interested in where he could volunteer?
Hi Cassandra! Thanks for the reply!
He does accept and welcomed his diagnosis. He’s had social worker and support workers but he’s hated all of them, one came once and he refused to see them again afterwards. He refuses help from the GP for his depression. He had CBT but it didn’t help.
He relays heavily on me for food etc, he’d rather go hungry than go to the shops to buy himself something. I know he has social anxiety, and is anxious in general, I know he’s depressed and lacks motivation. I get all that but he needs to help himself. I suggested registering on here earlier but he refused. Maybe it’s embarrassment that stops him doing things. It’s frustrating!
*CASSANDRO..... apologies!! Predictive text! lol
No problem, it's a made-up name anyway. You can edit any of your posts, by the way (for a week at least), by clicking on the 'More' beneath them.
Maybe your elder son thinks his depressive thoughts are realistic, rather than something to be 'treated'. And that may be the truth, but not the whole truth. So, was the CBT of the kind that is adapted for autistic people, who may for example not recognise their own feelings? Sometimes books explaining CBT theory might help - I'm specifically thinking of understanding reinforcing cycles of behaviour and whether or not it is healthy to stay within a limited 'comfort zone'. Two books I keep mentioning are Overcoming Depression by Paul Gilbert and Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns. Another way of putting 'he needs to help himself' is that he can use his freedom however he likes, maybe a lesson learned earlier in typically developing adolescence.
What happens if you ask him if he'll come to the shops with you to help choose food?
How do the two of them get on together, incidentally? I hope you get more responses from other parents, although most of the 'regulars' here seem to be autistic adults like me.
Wow you’re really knowledgeable! At the moment he’s waiting on some mire CBT but this time, more suitable for people on the autistic spectrum, that’s prob why the first didn’t work.
If I ask him to go shopping, he refuses! Just point blank refuses.
My two boys get on well, they always have done. My younger son is more ‘sociable, he has friends round and goes out with them. He tries to include his brother but once again he refuses.
He does volunteer one afternoon doing computer stuff at the local hospice. He’s only just started this and it’s the only tangible thing he has outside the house, But even the 3 hrs he does exhausts him because he stays awake all night and sleeps till late afternoon!